Hi Bev,

A very warm welcome to our forum.

I am sorry to hear that you now need a mastectomy on your left breast and cannot have reconstruction.. Could you possibly have an implant instead of reconstruction? This is not such a long operation, but I expect that it will depend upon how well your Diabetes is controlled. Do you have Type 1 Diabetes? I had a lumpectomy 14 years ago and a double mastectomy the year after that. As far as the cancer goes, I felt better after the mastectomies, than I did after my lumpectomy, as I feel that I have done all that I can, to get rid of the Cancer. I was unable to have reconstruction, due to previous non-Cancer related surgery. At first my scars looked very red and  obvious and the breast that has had 2 operations, has never looked as good as the other one.

From what I have read on this forum over the years, I believe that it is possibly easier to accept our breasts after a double mastectomy than after a single. This is because we are still symmetrical. Some people say that they feel a bit lopsided, when they only have one natural breast. I manage well with a selection of different prostheses for various activities and have to be careful not to wear anything that is too low cut. I have accepted that having no natural breasts is the price that I've paid to stay alive and I'd do the same all over again in a heartbeat.  However, I am married and older than you and I am fortunate that my hubby is just glad to still have me around. I would probably be a little more concerned if I were younger, or seeing someone for the first time. However, I would hope that anyone who was worth their salt, wouldn't abandon me because of this. Although my breasts were always something that I valued, I know that I have other attributes that can attract people and I'm sure that you have too.

I too felt bad about my initial lumpectomy scars, but I became more accepting of the appearance after a few years, when the scars had faded. You are still early days after your lumpectomy and they will look a lot better in time.

Having said all of the above, my acceptance didn't come overnight. It took me time to come to terms with the changes in my body.

Why do you now need a mastectomy - is this because you didn't get clear margins after surgery?

I sincerely hope that you can come to terms with the changes involved in a mastectomy. Have you got a date for your surgery yet?

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hello yes the area was much bigger than thought so this is the only option they won’t put an implant in due to my diabetes xx if I lost both breasts I think I’d handle that better xx I know ur right a good person would accept me as I am as it’s something am doing to save my life xx my operation is 4/1/24 xx I have type 2 diabetes it’s not controlled my weights been up and down since my boyfriend left me over a year ago he doesn’t know any of this xx thank u for taking the time to reply xx