Hi Steptoe,

A very warm welcome to our forum.

I am so sorry to hear that you have already lost so many loved ones to this disease and that you believe that you have now succumbed to it yourself. Like you, I lost a number of family members to it, including my mum. I was diagnosed with breast cancer 14 years ago and had a second bout the following year. I look upon my scars and altered body, as a token of my fight and am proud of my own personal war wounds. Despite my struggles, I still lead a busy and fulfilling life and I sincerely hope that you will too. 

The connotations of the word cancer have changed in recent years. I remember a time when we would whisper about the "Big C" in hushed tones, as the killer disease. Thankfully, although we are still scared of it, treatments have advanced considerably in recent years and many are now living with it. Sadly, we haven't got all the answers yet, but I'm ever hopeful that there will come a day when we do have. This will be the biggest fight of your life, but it is well worth fighting for. Do you know when you will get your biopsy results? I hope that you don't have long to wait.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine

Thank you for the reply , i just can't fear an illness to be honest i just see it is a fight yup a down and dirty fight this will be but i get a little touch when people say i am so sorry because in truth it can hit anyone it does not pick and choose .

Yes i remeber the times oh mum has a illness it is not good but we can help her and so on and no one wanting to use the word which that is all it is a word , i am at the minute coming to terms with it and putting things in place if the worst is to come and i want to protect my wife as much as i can and put as much in place for her , she is a tough cookie herself and a rock for me , we met and 3 days later wanted to get married and 37 years alter well she is still here through some very tough times , cancer is not my first ilnnes i damaged my brain in a building accident and have died a number of times and my wife well she stood strong picked me up and dusted me down and said ok lets start again on this shall we .

It is funny to me people forget the people behind us in the fight and well i just support all charities that we can as i say we have a number of issues between us and love that these now sites are here i know years ago there was nothing so thank you for the site .

I will be looking in to cannabis as i saw somewhere that cancer reasearch are about the only people to have looked at it and the effect it may or may not have , right now my pain is nothing to be honest as i suffer major head problems and pain issues os sort of deal with it in the sense ok right now i have pain and tomorrow i will feel better , i do use pain meds but sparingly as i hate chemicals going in the body from a very early age i was like that seeing my mum .

Ok well i may waffle but love a chat and like i say if i can help ever to anyone always feel i should .

Thanks again and loving the site and reading the forums or boards whatever people call them we are very low tech people here lol not even a mobile phone well i have but 26 years old and just for text from hospital lol

thanks again and stay safe 

Hi Steptoe,

It sounds as if you have already had quite a fight with your brain injury, so you are no stranger to a challenge.  How long ago did this accident happen? I am delighted to hear that you have such good support in your wife and can understand your need to put everything in place for her.  Serious injuries impinge on loved ones every bit as much as they do on the patient and they are quite often overlooked in our battles - treasure her, as it sounds as if you've got a good one there. 

I see that our moderator Steph, has already pointed you in the direction of the information on this site about medical cannabis and I hope that you find this helpful.

I sincerely hope that all goes as well as possible for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine

The accident was 25 years ago and been dead 10 times since then yup i am just to naughty to be let up and the down below said no room he is just to good so i guess i got sent back , i always joke about illness because i feel it gives me control of it not the other way round , yes the first few years were the hardest being told you will never work again when work was your life and being told no going out with out the wife as people use to try and do the 1 2 3 on me and bash on my chest and then after the pacemaker well one time i hit the floor in sainsburys the wife had pop round the corner on the clothes area and people started screaming get and ambulance get the defrib lunky she came back round shouting stop stop he has a pacemaker , it is funny like i say the nurse at the hospital said i am very up about it but the only bit that is scaring me is stopping the blood thinner for the biopsy and the risk of a stroke but i am staying positive on that because i can not let things get in my head and run wild .

I am positive about it as the cancer looks to have just hit the lung and for now that is the bonus for me if i loss a lung so be it but if it moves then well thats the harder fight , i know cancer up close so to speak and seen the nasty things it does but again i refuse to let that get in my head i know it is going to be a down and dirty type fight and the treatment is not going to be a picnic but again as long as i can get the pain under control i will be good i hate being sick as in sick even when i had food poisoning it was a struggle for me to be sick even then the doctors kept saying don't hold back let it out is the best but well my gag and reach reflx is funny .

Yes i had a nice read see i know a fair bit on cannabis not as a user as more a friend of people if that makes sense and growing up in the 70's and 80's you know the time of the spliff , mate use to love the stuff and glue my vise was southern comfort and girl lol yup i will say i was not always a great person but well i call it living and learning from mistakes .

I am sorry you have been hit by cancer again but i hope your treatment goes easier on you , i am sure you know whats coming and that to me is the thing i like to know how to control the problem but this time i just have to hand over my body to the doctors and say well over to you then once they have finished it is over to me to then fight along side the treatment , i just think it is now great sites like this are around as i say when i was 13/14 there was nothing and well it screwed my head for many years , well i tend to waffdle on to as the wife says iam like and old woman for chatting but sometimes just letting it out helps .

chat soon just made madam her dinner and soon it is cuppa and water bottle and bed , well after i feed the cats lol ypu long story but 3 strays well 2 and a neighbours lol 

hi steph thank you so much i have had a good read and chatted to a few friends who say watch any form of smoke in the lungs , someone pointed me to dry herb vaping and just reading on that but i would never take a step without chatting to my nurse first and the doctors but thank you

Hi Steptoe,

You sound like my hubby. He had to stop work 26 years ago, just after he had been given a quadruple by-pass, then developed pneumonia, before he had a series of strokes. I'm glad to hear that you have had a pacemaker fitted now. Could you wear something to indicate that you have this? My hubby has since developed Parkinson's, Diabetes and Heart Failure and he wears an SOS bracelet to indicate this.

Try not to worry about stopping the blood thinner for the biopsy. This will only be for a short period and the doctors are used to dealing with people who have to stop taking this for a short while. My hubby has to have a tooth removed on Monday and he has to stop his meds for that too. Fortunately, he has had to do this before for different reasons and has suffered no ill effect, so far.

What a pity that you now have been lumbered with lung cancer. Try to put your faith in your care team, as you hand your body over to them and let them worry about taking good care of you. Your fighting spirit in conjunction with their care and treatment, should see you through. I agree that it is great to have sites like this to chat on now - there was nothing like this available when my mum was dying either.

I trust that your wife enjoyed her dinner and that you have 3 contented cats tonight.

Take care.

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine 

The cats are spoilt , i am not a cat person but the long story short one came from under the neighbours shed when we had the beast from the east years ago she then well worked her way in the dinning room the second came last summer winter time she was scared to be near people only coming for the food out for the foxes , we gained her trusted now she does not like to be away from us you go in the garden she comes running out the house with us and follows us and you sit she is on yor lap lol just a big fat giner fluffpot , the 3rd belongs to a enighbour but they have kids and lots of kids in and out so she took to living here lol .

My wife loved her dinner as i did carrot and swede mash to so i got extra brownie points , i love to cook well i use to as a teen and then i think my wife only marriedm e for me cooking lol , i try to do as much as i can because she use to still work and look after me so having the house tidy and a meal for her well felt the right thing so i started watching and reading on cooking more to learn new stuff well thats been 25 years now lol , my wife would joke i was the original naked chef because i was known if she said i could eat and omellete i would get up out of bed whizz in the kitchen and make her a cheese ham and tomatoe just as a snack .

I am trying to just say about the blood thinner is has to be and it will be over next friday and then we shall see where we go i am positive because i feel that like i have said i just refuse to not fight the doctors and nurses have done so much over the years to keep me here for me to quit would be well a waste , i do wear and id tag the large round the neck type with the snake round the sword as on the ambulances but you will laugh an ambulance crew came out to me in the garden wife was there and the necklace was clear to see as i make sure it is always on the outside of the clothes , so the one said to the other get the paddles ready and my wife said your not going to need them he has a pacemaker the guy looked and said ok thank you for telling us and she then pointed them to the necklace and he replied i kid you not i have never seen one of them before i will have to watch for that symbol , my wife looked at him once they got me in the ambulance and pointed to the sign on the ambulance omg was his reply and he was an older paramedic .

ok have a great weekend i am off to do a wasjig with madam and chill watching old comedies 

Hi Steptoe,

For someone who is not a cat person, you seem to be collecting quite a menagerie of spoilt moggies.

I am glad to hear that your wife enjoyed her dinner. It sounds as if you enjoy cooking and have honed your skills by watching TV and reading to find new recipes. I retired last year and I have been very fortunate, in that my hubby also enjoys cooking. This was a great help when I was working and I feel very lucky that he still wants to continue, now that I've retired.

I can understand your concerns about the blood thinner, but put your faith in your doctors. I'm sure that they're not ready to let you go yet. Your necklace/ID tag, sounds like exactly what I was talking about - it's incredible to believe that your ambulance man didn't know about this, especially when it was imprinted on the door of the ambulance.

I hope that you enjoyed your old comedies over the weekend.

Jolamine