Hi JoCatMom,

A very warm welcome to our forum.

What a nightmare situation you're in - no wonder you're struggling. First of all, my sincere sympathy on the loss of your ex husband. Second, I am so sorry to hear about your husband's diagnosis and hope that he is recovering from his infection. Can I ask what ages your son's are and whether or not they live near to you? Life sometimes throws us some real challenges and there's nothing you can do, but try to keep your head above water.

You are trying to be so strong and to take all of the weight on your shoulders, but this is a time for sharing your grief and your worries with your sons (assuming that they are both adults). I am sure that you have some dark moments, when you are alone - we all do. Please remember that a death and a cancer diagnosis impinge on all of the family. Don't be afraid to talk about how you all feel and try to recall happier times, as well as your current situation.

Have you considered talking to a counsellor from one of the cancer charities about how you feel? I was most reluctant to do this, when I had a hard time a few years ago, but it was the best thing that I ever did. It helped me to put my life into perspective and to realise that I needed support too. I attended Maggie's, but there are a number of cancer charities throughout the country, that offer this service, free of charge. You can also pop into these centres for a cuppa and chat to others, who have gone, or are going through, upheaval in their lives, as a result of cancer.

Now that you have found this forum, you also have a place to chat. We are here for the bad days, as well as the good. We know the agonies you are going through and we are always here for you.

Please keep in touch and remember that you are never alone, now that you've found us.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx