Welcome to our forum, Simon.

I'm sorry to hear about the difficult and uncertain situation you're facing. As many here can tell you, it's natural to have concerns and fears, especially when waiting for biopsy results. Please remember that while it's challenging, it's important not to jump to conclusions based solely on internet research. Medical professionals are the best source of information and guidance in situations like this.

I understand that it's difficult to share these feelings with your wife, but remember that she cares deeply about you and may want to be there for you during this challenging time. 

While waiting for your results, try to take care of your physical and emotional well-being as best as you can. Sometimes focusing our minds on other things can help.

I hope all turns out ok for you Simon. Once you know more, if you have the time, please come back to give us an update. We're keeping our fingers crossed for you.

Best wishes,

Renata, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi Simon,

I know how anxious you will be but please take a breath and try & slow down your thoughts for a moment. 

Just because the GP thought it was one thing and now the dermatologist showed some concern does not 100% mean it is melanoma or, if it is, that you are staring death in the face.

When the dermatologist said it may be just a funny mole she means it could be dysplastic (precancerous). 75% of patients that are referred to a dermatologist are found to have benign or dysplastic moles, so the odds yours is one of these 'ugly ducklings' are high. If it is melanoma, most are found at an early stage and therefore easily treated with surgery & monitoring for a period of time. There are now drug treatments for those with a higher stage of melanoma and these treatments are showing great success, so things aren't as desperate as they were years ago. 

Whilst waiting for your results stop looking at Google and distract yourself - talk to your wife as it helps enormously to share your worries with the person closest to you. Go for long walks - fresh air & exercise will help your appetite & you will sleep better. In the words of my dermatologist when I was diagnosed, 'It's not the end of the world' - it really isn't, with the help of your hospital team. Oh, and stop prodding those lymph nodes because they don't like it & they WILL swell if they're continually prodded. Good luck and please let us know how you get on,

Angie (Stage 3 melanoma patient since 2009)

Hi AngieT

You should become one of the cancer helpers /  representatives as you seem to be quite clued up on things.

I noticed on one of your replies on another post to another person about a dermatoscope being used.

I went 3 times to my GP and on the first 2 occasions they both just looked at it with the naked eye without a dermatoscope and said its nothing to worry about.

But on the third occasion the first GP I had seen said it looks like a Seborrheic Keratosis, and he still did not use a dermatoscope he took a photo of it with his phone and booked me an urgent referral.

At the hospital the dermatologist did use a dermatoscope and then said it looked concerning, and made an off the cuff remark that it could still be a funny mole, I had the biopsy that same morning.

That's why I know it is melanoma as the dermatologist looked at it with a dermatoscope so she must have been able to see it was melanoma, by using the dermatoscope than just using a naked eye.

And like I said this on my post this morning, her face seemed to say it all.

Thank you AngieT

Simon.

Hi Simon,

The dermatascope only shows a change in cell structure which then leads to a biopsy which is the only way to 100% confirm malignancy. Moles whose cell structure is changing doesn't always mean it's melanoma, it may be precancerous and it's been caught before it becomes malignant. 

Not every GP surgery has a GP that is trained to use a dermatascope. A GP that is interested in dermatology has to go on a day's course in how to use it. More surgeries are having a GP trained up but there are still many that are behind the times!

Hi AngieT.

Thank you for your reply.

But by my reckoning and doing all the maths, I must of had this thing for about 3 to 5 years at least.

So with it being so long, they must be able to tell that it is melanoma and it must at a very late stage as well.

Thank you.

Simon.

No, it doesn't work that way. A mole can take a long time to change so, even though you've had it for a few years, it doesn't always mean it's melanoma or that it's been melanoma for a long time. If it was late stage you would have serious symptoms depending on where it's spread to. I had my mole since my teens but it wasn't until my late 30s it started to darken. Over a year later it was removed and it was still only Stage 1b (0.7mm deep).

No, they can't 100% tell it's melanoma by looking at it, either with the naked eye or a dematascope. Only a biopsy can tell what it is. I've had 7 moles removed that my consultant thought were suspicious and only 1 was melanoma. So that shows you, even with 30 years experience, a consultant cannot know if it's cancerous. Doing the maths doesn't work with melanoma - it's the most unreliable of cancers, no two people have the same experience and melanoma doesn't always follow the usual image that you see on Google. You are worrying yourself into an early grave by trying to analyse your mole, it's history & how it looks but I'm afraid it really doesn't work like that. Hopefully you will be one of the many that get a clear biopsy result ie. benign or precancerous. If not, the odds are still very high that it's been caught early so please don't try to overanalyse what is can't be. Think of melanoma as being 'how long is a piece of string/' - no one guess until it's biopsied.

Angie

Sorry, predictive text took over. It should read at the end - so please don't try to overanalyse what it can be. Also - 'how long is a piece of string?' no one can know until it's biopsied.

Hi.AngieT

I would like to say a big thank you to you and a all the others have been a a big help and a big comfort to me and I really really appreciate it.

Also I know people are going through alot worse than me, with real problems and I do feel guilty as I haven't even had my results as yet.

A couple of days ago i had to go and see the nurse for  my diabetic check up that I have to have every few months.

I have known the same nurse for quite a few years, so I told her about what was going on and how I felt etc.

When I told her I had been searching the internet she said "don't Google Dr death" "if you do that you might as well go straight to the funeral directors"

I haven't been to googling things since very helpful people like you have told me to keep away.

Thank you AngieT

It is very very much appreciated.

Simon.

Well done that nurse! Google causes more anxiety than it helps. You are very welcome Simon. Good luck, fingers crossed xx

Thank you AngieT.

It is still on my mind all of the time, but will try my best to calm down.

Have a lovely weekend.

Thank you.

Simon.