Hi Claire 

sorry to hear about your diagnosis , I also got breast cancer had the operation on aug 9 th waiting on chemo and radio , I hope that all goes well I'm sure after a few weeks it will sink in and you get your surgery and recover soon just think of it as 1 year of upset then this time next year your cancer will be removed and you will be getting better after all of it keep busy keep your chin up I no it's hard you can do it xxx good luck x

Hi laraj, thank you so much for your reply. I just find it so difficult to talk to my family about it at the moment as they just say you got to think positive but I'm just finding it so hard at the moment. I know they mean we'll but they just don't understand how I really feel, so thought I would try this as there's other people going through the same as me. Hope your doing well and best wishes to you 

I totally understand, you try to be positive outside but when you think deep you can't breathe , I can tell you though my diagnosis was June 29 th it does get easier and I find it better to talk to outsider than family and friends you can direct message me anytime, we can do this xx 

Hi Claire47

I had a breast cancer diagnosis back in 2019. I didn't have lung cancer and I am older than you, but I just wanted to send my very best wishes to you knowing how scary it all is.  I completely hear you about that notion of 'thinking positively'!! It's what everyone says without any understanding of the trauma it is being told you have cancer.  Life is turned on it's head from that very moment. I have always tried to go forward believing I will get well (and I have) but it's not easy. Plus there are days of course when I wanted to scream. It's all quite normal and without an outlet it makes life even harder. Crying helps too but I couldn't shed any tears for weeks. Just the shock of it all I think.  

Family support IS so vital but honestly I could only really talk openly to the cancer clinic staff or to others on this forum who absolutely 'get' what cancer does to us. It was (and continues to be) a big support to me. It's a place where you can say how it is and it's understood and more importantly it's ok!! 

Fear grips us all. We take steps forward and somehow we begin to grow through the trauma. It's a very gradual process and I never thought it could happen. I mean cancer HOW on earth am I going to manage that?? Gradually we all do. I was helped as I say by wonderful people on this forum and by talking to my breast care nurses. They were fabulous. My husband was always supportive but he didn't truly get it. Not his fault. Cancer is a horrible club but you need to be IN it to understand. 

I wish you well. Look after yourself. Be kind to yourself and allow yourself time to just hurt. Hold someone's hand who knows. It's healing in itself. No one expects you to be a hero. Why should you be?? Life has given you a major knock and you need time to adjust, manage the treatment and get well at your own speed. You will. Life will smile again. 
kebbs x x 

Hi kebbs, a very big thank you for your message. Every word in it is just so very true. I have only just joined this site and already I feel a bit better. Your kind words and understanding mean so much to me. When I was diagnosed a few weeks ago it felt like my whole world came crashing down on me. I was thinking why me what have I done wrong, will I see my 3 lovely boys grow up, get married and have children. I wasn't able to say the word cancer but now I'm just about able to say it. I will definitely be using this site a lot and my cancer nurses as im finding it is helping. I'm just taking each day one step at a time.

Thanks very much once again xx