Hello James, so sorry to hear about your Dad's cancer diagnosis.  Sometimes it is easier to relate to strangers when we are going through a crisis in our lives.  Very often our friends mean well, but because they are not going through what we are going through, it can be hard for them to truly understand how we feel.  On this forum James, everyone is more or less in the same boat........some of us have cancer, some of us are caring for loved ones with cancer, and sadly some of us have lost loved ones to cancer.  You are feeling numb because you are in shock.  You know James, there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way to behave when someone we love is seriously ill, because everyone is different.  You know your parents better than anyone, just let them know that whatever help they need, you are there for them, and sometimes James, our loved ones get annoyed with us when they are very ill for the smallest of reasons, but this is very often the illness itself that is making them behave this way, it isn't because you have actually said or done anything 'wrong'.  My best wishes James, to you, your Dad and your Mum, Violet, x