Dad is giving up and now refusing treatment

Hi, My dad was diagnosed with AML a few weeks ago after he was admitted to hospital for chest pain. He started chemo and was on it for 3 days but he got an infection and has rapidly deteriorated and it has had to be stopped. His kidneys have failed and we have been told the lukemia is uncurable. My dad has given up and Is now refusing all treatment as he said he doesn't want to go through it anymore. It's breaking my heart. He's my best friend and we have always been there for each other. There's no escaping the fact that he is going to die now. The doctors have had the talk with me. I'm struggling to cope with everything but I'm trying to be strong for him and my kids. I'm trying to be there for him but it's out of my hands. I need help. I don't know how I'll be able to cope without him. I'm his only child and the rest of the family (my uncles and aunty etc) live all over the country. I feel so alone. Is anyone else in the same or a similar situation? 

Parents
  • Same ' my Father was diagnosed stage 4 lung cancer ! 5th October 2021 and he doesn't want to take treatments' at the moment he is ok ' not lost weight or appetite or pain . But I don't know how ill cope with if he suffers pain ..... 

    he told me that he want to spend his time left with his children . Ill keep undate how it goes 

  • Aww I'm so sorry you are going through this too. Unfortunately my dad passed away last week as he couldn't carry on and it hurts so much. Please keep in touch and if you need to talk I am always here for you along with the many others on this wonderful forum. 

  • Definitely is nice to talk to people going through the same thing. My dad was diagnosed only 4 weeks ago with aggressive mixed neuro endocrine cancer. I am so frightened 

  • Hi Lea1306,

    I'm so sorry you are going through this pain. I know it's truly heartbreaking and frightening but stay strong for you and your dad. He will need you more than ever now. Always here to talk if you need to. It definitely helps to let it out. 

  • Hi bestrong08

    thanks for the reply. It's the hardest thing ever isn't it. 
    I'm trying to be strong but I find it so hard and breakdown when I visit. I love him so much and worry how my children will also cope as he has been such a big part of our lives 
     

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    HI Lea,

    I am sorry to hear that you find yourself in this unenviable position too. Faced with difficult situations like this we all somehow or other get the strength to see this through. Just be there for your dad as often as you can. Ensure that he is as confortable as possible and that any pain he has is being well controlled.Talk to your dad and don't leave anything left unsaid.

    Some of the cancer charities provide advice booklets on how to break the news of a death to children, which are very useful.

    I am thinking of you and your family at this sad time. Please keep in touch. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

Reply
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    HI Lea,

    I am sorry to hear that you find yourself in this unenviable position too. Faced with difficult situations like this we all somehow or other get the strength to see this through. Just be there for your dad as often as you can. Ensure that he is as confortable as possible and that any pain he has is being well controlled.Talk to your dad and don't leave anything left unsaid.

    Some of the cancer charities provide advice booklets on how to break the news of a death to children, which are very useful.

    I am thinking of you and your family at this sad time. Please keep in touch. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

Children