My childhood was a very unpleasant one. My mum suffered from depression, she would kick me out offer at a young age. She would drink and take over doses a lot. I have even witneess her attempt suicide. My mum has been over taking prescription drugs for a very long time and was told many times when I would be at the hospital whilst she got her stomach pumped or drunk tar to throw up later in life thr damage would be iriverseable now aftwr have hep B and not taking thr aftecare. Her liver has developed cancer which has spread and she has 6months. I wanted to know more about her past ans why I was never enough for her to want to look after or spent time with me. She never done a thing I would say her door was always open later in life but never done a thing. I feel so much anger towards her now because she abused  her body and tried for so many years to commit suicide. I have so many resentments. She would often get drunk ans tell me she hates me call my names and the same to my sister ans brother..how can I forgive this???I hate feeling this way and I want to forgive  but I can't seem too. Everything time I think of a memorie there all so bad and I know deep down she's the one who was hurting ana punishing herself but how can I forgive ???