Mum was diagnosed with Lung Cancer 2017 and metastatic bone cancer in the hip Feb 2020. Had surgery to pin the hip, really limited mobility and lots of fatigue and pain. 

Mum is really struggling to accept any 'outside help' or talk about a downstairs care package, even thought it is clear to all of us she is in total agony using the stairs. She tells her macmillan worker that she has a very supportive family (but we all live very far away and can only help for a few days and then the rest of the time it is my elderly dad caring 24/7)

It is so hard to see her struggle, and decline professional help. With a lot of stress we finally got her to accept using hospital transport to get to an appointment. 

How do I manage my frustration at her reluctance to accept help. I live very far away and can only stay a few days as I have a family of my own and a full time job. 

I wish she would allow Marie Curie nurses to come in and give my elderly dad a break from lifting her in and out of bed, fetching and carrying, dealing with mood swings, hosting guests, cooking-cleaning and all personal care. 

Sorry for the moan, I know her struggle is so much harder than what I am feeling. But I just wish she wasn't so proud and so private about her diagnosis and would allow Dad to get some help in. 

Any advice-guidance would be most welcome.