Hi Nicola....

Oh bless, how crule life must seem now ... it's one of the hardest things we go through in life ... sadly no easy way round ... all I can say, is they would give her chemo if they thought she was strong enough or that it may benifit her ... 

I lost my granddaughter to acute myeloid leukaemia a few months ago... well a year next month ... and she was 17/18 at the time ... she had intense chemo, radio, and a stem cell transplant in those 8 months from diagnoses ... she lost her beautiful hair and had so many side effects ... all the time thinking she'd come out the other end ... she only got a couple of weeks of near normal again ... to loose her fight any way ...

If only we'd known, we could have made better memories instead of treatment ones ...  so all I'd say to you, is hold on tight to the day ... don't look ahead ... make as many memories as you can ... you can live the time she has, in grieving now... or you can grab this time to admit your both scared... tell her all that your heart wants to say ... watch a movie .. walk in the park ... those little things will help your mum more then you know .. it's a rollercoaster emotional ride.... it's o.k to rant and cuss at this cancer ... but don't let it take one more day from you, then it does ... cancer wants you to spend every day down and crying .. then it gets us just where it wants us ...

I'm talking from my point of view to. I had a grade 3 breast cancer in 2017 ... and I'm spending each day as a bonus ... so fingers crossed you'll get many memories yet ... sending you a vertual hug.... Chrissie x

Hi Chrissie,

Thank you for your reply and kind words. I'm so sorry to read about your granddaughter! It's hard to accept but deep down I know moms not strong enough, we were always looking to this for a little hope maybe am extra months and now there is nothing. I feel that moms become so weak and I'm still hanging on to hope, she was supposed to be having iv fluids but has chosen not to which is breaking my heart.

Thank you for your advice, hopefully when mom has a good day we can get her out and make some memories .

Take care xxxx

It's such a hard thing to take and we rail against what we can't change.  Mum is not well enough for chemo.  They do blood tests two days before each treatment and if your bloods aren't good enough then it's not given.  My husband had chemo because he had the right blood count but it's a harsh treatment and kills your immune system completely so lots of infections, loss of appetite, exhausted so sleep for hours and hours.  So until you've seen it then you have no idea of how much it affects you.  Chriss is right, just make memories and look after each other.  Take care, Carol x 

Hi Carol, thank you for your message . I'm trying to stay strong for my mom and dad. Hoping I can come to terms with it all quickly so I can be there for my mom. Yesterday was a big shock all over again and just feel exhausted.

Take care xx