A couple of weeks ago I was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer and this week, as I celebrated my 38th birthday, I was told it had spread quite extensively into my lymph nodes and bones and was incurable.
My husband and I have, as much as possible, accepted this diagnosis and I'm awaiting an appointment with an oncologist to discuss my palliative care plan. Currently, I'm operating at 98% so I'm also tentatively planning different activities to meet old friends, see places I love and enjoy whatever time I've got ahead of me whilst I'm able to.
So yes, incredibly sad news and I don't want to die BUT my husband and I are planning as luxurious, pleasurable and calm future as possible. I'll co-operate with palliative care and, if by some miracle, any future treatment plans that might pop up as my situation changes.
However some members of my family, despite me sitting down with them and clearly laying out my plans, are already trying to push for harsher treatment options (something my consultant and I agreed would merely leave me feeling ill during my last months/years and unable to enjoy my time) and suggesting "healthy eating options" and weird alternative medicines/cannabis.
How can I, politely, reiterate to my well-meaning but in denial family members that I'm happy to work with my doctors and deal with my diagnosis on my terms and I most certainly won't be wasting the short time I've got left (before my tumour forces me on to tube feeding) drinking kale juice?!
To those who are those family members in their families, how would you best want to be told to "back off"?
