Hi, I've been up all night unable to sleep and reading through some posts has made me want to post my experience to see if it helps somehow. My gran was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer at the end of January and was given a few months to a year to live. I briefly saw her at her house and she looked well for someone who had just been diagnosed. I felt better for seeing her and felt positive that once this lockdown ends I could go and spend time with her in her final months. 
This all changed on Monday when she went to hospital for some tests and was kept in. We have now been told they will keep her in hospital and that the cancer is very aggressive and it won't be much longer. 
I am really struggling to come to terms with this as it has all happened so suddenly. I am angry that I haven't been able to spend time with her over the last year due to the pandemic. I feel terrible for her as she is alone in the hospital with no visitors and I just want to be with her. 
I'm 27 living with a flatmate in another city. I lost a friend from university to cancer in April 2020 during the first lockdown and found that very difficult too. 
I just wanted to share my story. Thank you for taking the time to read it.