Hello DoBu, 

A warm welcome to Cancer Chat. I am so sorry to hear about your mum and the fact that she is getting weaker by the day at the moment. It's good that she can be at home surrounded by those she loves the most. Your mum sounds really organised as she has already sorted all these practical matters, even the smallest details regarding funeral arrangements. It's not surprising though that now that she has sorted all these things that she can have control over, all of a sudden she is finding herself thinking about death and feeling frightened about it. All you can do is be there for her as you have been doing and listen to her.  I thought I would share with you a few links that may be helpful to you to help you support your mum through this difficult time. In particular we have a page precisely on the subject of talking about dying which you can find here and which I hope will help you find the right words during this difficult time. Our Dying with Cancer  section may also be of interest to you, for example the part on making plans such as leaving behind important memories which you can read more about here. 

I hope this helps a little but as nothing replaces hearing from personal accounts and experiences, I will let some of our members - who have also had to talk to a loved one about the difficult subject of death - come and say hello and share their story with you. 

Thinking of you and your mum during this difficult time.

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator