So so sorry your going through this heartbraking time at the moment.... that's one of the hardest things we will ever go through ...
The thing is, there's probly two sides to your story ... from your thread, you say it's not your dad there .. I'm just thinking there must be history of tention ... did you get on with mum before this .. or your mum's hubby ... how long has he been with her ...
There's so many sinarios to be fare ... he could be utilising the situation to keep you away ... it maybe he feels let down on how much you all did before this ...
Whatever the problem is, I'd try to stay calm and write or phone, and explain gently how much you want to see her ... I know I fell out with one of my son's, but I'd never ever close my door to him ... but I wonder how your mum would feel ... can you say hand on heart you've always tried to keep in contact ..
I'm so sorry, there's no easy answer or magic wand to change things .. but either way , if she's there in your heart, you'll keep her there forever and no one can stop that or take it away ... if I don't see my oldest lad, I'll carry him in my heart and still love him unconditionally.... and I'm on my cancer journey...
I so hope you find a way through ... only you know all the sercomstances.... look into your heart ... but know there's always that bond mum's have .. they may cut the cord at birth , but that just leaves an invisible cord there forever ... Chrissie.....
He has always been controlling he certainly is using this to keep us away
we have tried to call and he cancels our calls. He will allow his son to go there with his children to spend time with our mum but he won't let me and my brother. When she was in hospital we both went to see her and mum wanted to see us
When mum was coherent we talk to her on the phone and arrange to go see her but we get there and he turns us away
Oh my hunny, how sad ... and it happens so many times ... we hear this more then we should on here .. lve been lucky enough to never fall out with family when I lost mum and dad ... so my heart goes out to you ... in my opinion how dare he do that ... it's beond crule ... but I know I've always felt my mum around me over the years ... I'd still try ... because then you tried everything ... but just hope for the best but prepair for the worse ... then your heart will be ready ...
I still say, if I don't see my number one son and I go, I'll still look for him and watch over him ... I'm still so proud of him ... trust your mum will know that ... she will find you, trust me ... life's just not fare .. little does he know the devastation it causes ... or maybe he does ...
And when your mum passes you and your bro, do something ... have your own spiecial time you say good bye ... it's not just being at a funeral ... it's doing something to honour her memory .. he will think he's hurting you both .. but if you trust, she'll find you ... and you have your own time to say good bye .. could be somewhere she loved ... then he will not win ... and what goes around comes around... he will pay at some point ... a week / month or years in the future, he will get his carma ....
Sending you both a vertual hug.... hold on in there ... don't let him get the last laugh ... she's in your hearts ... Chrissie xx
