Can I get time off work for terminally ill mum

Hi,

This is my first time posting so I don't really know what to expect. I am 24 years old and my mum was diagnosed as terminally ill a year and a half ago. Up until last week she was receiving treatment but have since been told the cancer has spread and there's nothing more they can do. We did not ask for a specific time frame but the doctors hinted a few weeks - few months. She is already sleeping a lot, struggling to speak due to fluid on the lungs and itchy skin which bleeds along with a few other problems.

I work full time and have requested time off to deal with the news / spend time with my mum but it was denied due to the busy Christmas period, even though they know my circumstances. Can the GP give me a sick note? Can work fire me if I take time off sick with stress? Any advice would be appreciated 

  • Hi Maria,

     

    I'm so very sorry to hear about your mum.


    My mum was diagnosed with Lung Cancer in September and is now receiving fast track palliative care at home. She requires support 24/7 and I have taken compassionate leave/annual leave from work so far.
     

    I was considering applying for up to 3 months unpaid leave as I am able to do at my place of work however my manager advised today that I try and get a sick note so that I can continue to be paid.

    when you say that you can continue to produce sick notes - do you need to visit your GP each time or provide regular updates? It's something I have never needed to do before.

    thanks,

    Jo.

  • Hi Jo, 

    I am so sorry to hear of your sad news about your Mum.

    At my doctors you can fill an online form and recieve a text when to pick up the sick note. I didn't need to go into the surgery. I did however have rhe odd chat on the phone with a doctor asking if I needed more support. 

    Chat on here with me should you need anymore advise, I know all too well how you'll be feeling during this time. 

    Maria

  • I think it depends on the company you work for. I work for Active Care Group and their policy says I can only have time off without pay, whereas my Wife , who works for the NHS has been allowed a couple of paid days leave to help me look after my Mom. Seems unfair but that is the difference between working for a company who cares or one that doesn't

  • Hi if you need more time they will give you more time all you have to do is explain why you need more time it must be so stressful so its not like you're making it up ,don't be afraid to ask maybe ask for another month off if you need it ,there are plenty work days left ,your mam won't be around for ever so do what's best for you and your mam x

  • Hi there sorry to hear you’re in this position and I was lucky that my boss found me work again after my mum died of cancer .

    story goes she got diagnosed with lung cancer and I stepped in when she became unable to even stand un aided,unfortunately her husband is an alcoholic and abusive so no way was he going to care for her at home (we wouldn’t have that ) so after a long stay in hospital and despite her willing to go into care home there wasn’t any available locally.

    so I gave up work so care at my home with my my family (3 kids and partner ,she was with us 11-12wks and does peacefully (I was prev a carer so knew exactly how to make this possible for mum thankfully ) 

    The only problem we had was this…her husbands drinking problem and having mums dog with him at their home meant all mums benefits went to pay for the property and the bills and he still claimed carers despite NOT caring for her,I tried to claim but without his permission it was impossible !

    end result was me losing wks of income and now in debt a year leather and cannot catch up .

    don’t get me wrong it was lovely to be able to do that for my mum and finally able to keep her safe and comfortable in her last weeks but you must be sure the financial situation can allow you to dot his as finances can snowball out of control and seems the gov do not care a joy unfortunately

    get all the financial advice you can,I did not have the time off t was all very quick for us so it took the moral dilemma and just did all I could for mum and took the financial hit as she was more important 

  • Hi my mum has been diagnosed with terminal cancer .. she’s just had a period in hospital where she had sepsis . i had to take time off and only have 4 weeks at half pay as haven’t been there much longer than a year . they said they can’t keep my job open for me when the 4 weeks is over ! i don’t want to lose my job but it’s hard to work as i work in a hospice and with what mums going thru im str gling .. i just don’t know what to do