Hi

I am so sorry to hear of your dad's diagnosis, and I know that it can be so painful and scary on all the family. 

At the beginning of lock down,  my dad was diagnosed with kidney cancer after 3 years of scans to locate the source of the pain in his side. Hes since had his kidney removed in an attempt to fight this horrid disease.

Shortly after he was diagnosed with prostrate cancer, unrelated to kidney., which he now has hormone injections to control.

He was then diagnosed wirh secondary bone cancer, of which hes had a pin through his leg to maintain his mobility whilst he fights for his health.

Last week we found the real cause of the cancer, urethra cancer. This has led to the secondary kidney, bone and stomach cancer. My dad, and the whole family are devastated.

I am not sure how long he has left with us. He is beginning chemotherapy Shortly, but doctors fear it is too far advanced. He has been living wirh this disease for 3 years, with it slowly spreading. Just because it's terminal, there is no prognosis- he could have years more left. Your dad might surprise you and fight this for a while yet..

Due to covid, since his initial diagnosis I've only seen him once and fear that once he does start chemo, we won't be able to visit due to his low immune system. .

It is hard to stay positive, and I cry all the time. I don't know how to support my mum or my dad. But just knowing you are there for both of them will be comfort. Spend as much time wirh your dad as possible, in his final days. My dad doesn't like to talk about it, and that's fine- he wants us to carry on as normal. But he knows we are there if he wants to talk. 

The hardest thing I have to do is tell my 11 year old, who is so close to my dad. He adores him and is going to be heartbroken. I'm not sure how we as a family do this when the time is right? 

I'm sure your work will be understanding, mine hsve been so far. My director knows I'm not in the best place and makes exceptions if I can't face meetings etc. 

I'm sure you will get through this,people are remarkable and adapt to even the worst situations. Sending you and your amily big hugs  x