I have a dilemma, my mother-in-law has diagnose final stage of her cancer in China.  Both my wife and my brother-in-law knows about this but my mother-in-law still think that she is just very sick.  

I feel this is not right as I believe that my mother-in-law may want to know her condition so she might have something that she might want to do the reminder of her life.  My brother thinks and feel that if mother-in-law knows about it that she may not be able to control her emotion and also her mentality, then it may have a negative impact.  It has been almost 6 months when my brother-in-law has been doing everything he can within his power to find cure, medicine, treatments in hoping that there's a miracle where my mother-in-law gets better.

My mother-in-law now has two big tumour in her brain and another one in her stomach where if any one of these burst/bleed then she will not survive.  So it's almost like a time bomb.

Both myself and my wife is very frustrated because we cannot go back to see her because of the covid pandemic restriction for travel.

The 14-days quarantine and all the medical testing proof of assessment are not making the travel any easier.  The last thing we want is that we catches the virus during the journey which may then complicate things even more.  

So my question is if anyone have any experience at all in this dilemma is whether we should tell mother-law about her medical illness condition so at least she may have something that she want to do for the remainder of her life.

I don't want to challenge my brother-in-law's decision  but I just feel that my mother-in-law should at least be told about her condition, but then if we did, something bad may happen because she cannot handle the news, so the question is the tell or not to tell?

Really sorry to share with you with this dilemma but I can't not bear the sadness that I see with my wife and the frustration the fact that we cannot go and see her.

She has been my best mum, and it is so hurtful to see her suffering.  Especially when she thinks that she is very sick but really she is in her late stage of cancer.

Thanks for listening,

Dave