Move back home after dad's death?

Offline acm09 over 4 years ago

Hi,

My dad was diagnosed with bile duct cancer about 6 months ago. At this time it was advanced (stage 4) and a cure was not possible. He is deteriorating rapidly and I do not think we have much time left with him. I moved to the UK six years ago for university and I am now living and working in London. My parents are back home in Spain, and I do not have any siblings. I am extremely worried about my mum and how she will cope with being completely alone when my dad passes away. I have spoken to my mum about moving back home but she insists that I should not change my life plans because of this. I feel very guilty doing this to her and I do not know what is the right thing to do. Has anyone been in a simlar situation or is going through something similar now?

Thanks for listening x

Offline didis over 4 years ago

Hi acm09,

I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. It's admirable that you are considering moving back home to be with your mom. It likely brings her comfort just to know that you would uproot to be by her side.

Have you been back home to visit with your parents during this time? Maybe you could take an extended leave from work? You'll likely get a better sense of how your mom is coping.

I lost my dad last year to lung cancer, diagnosed at stage 4. Even though we lived in the same city and I was highly involved in his care so I cannot completely relate, I wanted to respond to you. I'm an only child too and stayed near my mom for the year following his death. She's doing a little better now but the first year is rough.

Take care,

Di
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