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Mum has hours/days to live and she is COVID positive

Claire93
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Hi everyone,

 

I have just received the awful call from the hospital advising mum's really gone downhill and she only has hours/short days left. I have recently found out I am pregnant and now I am so confused as to whether I should go in to see her or not due to her being on a COVID ward and COVID positive. 

I don't want to regret not seeing her but I also want to protect myself and my unborn child from this awful virus. None of my family or friends know about my pregnancy yet as I have only just found out. 

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    What a terrible situation to be in. I'm so sorry :( 

     

    Could you ask your GP for advice? Or midwife, if you've been assigned one? 
     

    Understandably...you want to protect your unborn child...and if your Mum is positive for coronavirus (and going off NHS guidance)...that might mean staying away (as the guidelines state you should avoid anyone with coronavirus symptoms). I have absolutely no medical training by the way...just going off the fact that your Mum has coronavirus, you're pregnant and what the guidelines state. 
     

    If you speak to your GP (or anyone at your Mum's ward) about this, the decision may be taken out of your hands (I can't imagine a GP or midwife being keen on you visiting a covid positive ward....but I might be wrong) xxx 

  • Offline in reply to citygirl111

    Yes your right, if mum makes it through the night I shall ring the GP tomorrow as I haven't been assigned a midwife as of yet. It's such a difficult situation to be in, I haven't seen mum for the last 6 weeks as I haven't been allowed into the hospital but when the doctor rang earlier he advised I would be allowed In and it's my decision whether to go or not. I don't want to live with regret for the rest of my life and I keep trying to think of what she would tell me to do but my mind is absolutely blank right now :( a mask and gloves just doesn't seem enough PPE but there is literally nothing else I could do. I don't want her to die alone but I also want to protect my future...

    Thank you for replying x

  • Offline in reply to Claire93

    It really is a difficult situation. I've not been pregnant myself but I think I'd figure the same...I'd be worried that PPE isn't 100% protective. I'd be nervous if it was just a mask, apron and gloves, certainly. 
     

    If it was me poorly, I wouldn't want a pregnant daughter of mine exposing herself. I'm sure most (if not all?!) mums would think the same...it's your Mum's grandchild after all and she will want to fiercly protect you and your baby too. 

    Sadly many other people have found themselves in this awful situation. Many loved ones have had to die without their family present due to virus - just so tragic and heartbreaking to imagine this. It's just one of those awful, horrible things - nothing much can be done about it. I've heard of people making use of technology - iPads/FaceTime/video to help them feel more connected to their loved ones in the final stages. 
     

    If you wanted to make a decision not to go because you were pregnant and wanted to protect you and your unborn child, nobody could blame you for that. You could do that guilt free. You have something extremely precious to protect...but I don't want to influence your decision, of course - that is one for you xx

     

    I hope you do get some clarity from any available medical staff to help you with your decision xxx Come back here anytime you need 
     


     

     

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    Hi

    Really feel for you here. I agree with citygirl. As a mum I wouldn't want a grandchild and daughter put at risk even if I were dying. Immune system is lower when pregnant. 

    Do the hospital know you class as vulnerable because you are pregnant?

    There are two people here - you and your unborn child. First make sure hospital are aware that you class as vulnerable and are still okay with a visit. Then get advice from GP because you may have other health issues that GP feels are relevant which combined with pregnancy would make a visit more risky.

    So sorry you are having to go through this. Tough times! Such a horrid dilemma.

    Might be best to tell close family member who could be with your mum instead? No one can make this decision for you - subject to hospital knowing you are vulnerable and still being okay with a visit. Don't hide information that could put you and your child at risk. Sending lovexx

  • Offline

    Is there any way someone can go and facetime/whatsapp video call for you? 

    It's a highly personal and anxious choice. 

     

    I flew back to see my mom in the height of covid. I had to, and wouldn't have it any other way. 

     

    xx<3

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