Hello and thank you for posting a question. I am very sorry to learn about your dad's situation. This must be very difficult for you all.

I can understand your need to be with your dad when things get worse. I am assuming that by getting worse you mean that your dad is approaching the last few days of his life. If this is what you mean and you want to be with him, I do hope that this works out for you.

It is fair to say that frequently it is possible to predict when someone is nearing the end of life, but unfortunately it is not always possible. This is because occasionally people can become quite ill suddenly and pass away within hours or even minutes. But it is more likely that your dad will become more and more sleepy and lapse and in and out of unconsciousness. He then is likely to stop drinking perhaps only taking sips of water. When this happens, often but not always death is a day or a few days away.

So as you can read, while there is a chance that you will get some warning and will be able to be with your dad towards the end of his life, this unfortunately cannot be guaranteed. I have spoken to many people who feel that they have let a loved one down as they were not with them in their last few hours and death. This is rarely the case. It is far more important to love and cherish people on a day to day basis and I would imagine that this is what you have done. So your dad will know that he is loved, even if circumstances go against you being present in his last hours, which hopefully they won't. I do hope that things are peaceful for your dad.

Please get back to us have any other questions You may find it helpful to talk things through with one of the nurses on our helpline.  The number to call is Freephone 0808 800 4040 and the lines are open from 9am till 5pm Monday to Friday.

All the best,

Jean