Hi i wasnt thinking my cancer come back only 2 years after first treatment so i have no eggs frozen.Nobody even adviced it to me.

Anyway if you go for a legal advice ask for all scans and notes feom doctors to be recorded on CD I have it its for free.I am thinking to take legal action too.I dont care now not all doctors and hospitals are brilliant or caring some of them even shouldnt practice medicine.My oncologists are really nasty people they dont help with anything.My husband when he heard the hospice word from the nurse he got really angry and he yelled at her that he will look after me no matter what.

It sounds like you have been badly let down just like us. I have already contacted somebody and  I think you should take action also. They are destroying people's lives. Not just the patient but the loved ones too. My 2 children's lives are torn apart as is mine, I met my husband at 16. He is my one and only, my soal mate.It sounds like you also have an amazing husband who will care for you no matter how difficult things get. Just as I am for my husband. I wish you all the luck in the world ️

Hi Michelle...so sorry about what you're going through. I too am caring for my husband in his last few days. First symptoms showed mid December....brain scan showed multiple brain tumours and body scan  showed it was in lungs, liver, bones, spine, lymph nodes and brain...and it was very fast growing. So no possible treatment just palliative care.

i was wondering if you have hospice at home in your area? My husband was adamant he wanted to die here and did not want to go into a hospice. Between our local hospice, hospice at home, district nurses and our gp, we are getting by. My main concern was the pain as the tumours in his shoulder and spine were causing a lot of pain for him...but it's been managed brilliantly.  He's now in our main room in a hospital bed, the syringe drive keeps the pain at bay and he is mostly comfortable .  We had thought he would be gone by today and to be honest I am running on empty! Hospice at home are sending in a night carer...I'll only be next door and can be with him at a moments notice...I can't believe I'll get much sleep but there's a chance. I'm really sorry you're not getting the help you need xx
 

Hello ,

I am so sorry that you are going through this too . We do have a local hospice but my husband also wants to die at home. He was offered 2 weeks in the hospice for symptom management as his behaviour and aggression was too much for me and like I said in my original post the tumours are in the worst parts of the brain , effecting his personality, memory , mood. I am losing him a little more by the day. He begged me not to send him so I didn't and the the dr from the hospital visits , we have a good Macmillan nurse , my children see somebody every fortnight but I am having to hide my husbands bizarre behaviour from our children and explain how dad can't help being angry .I can see how he tries to be normal and I get physical pain in my heart and am concerned him dying at home might not be the best decision for our children xx

Hi so very sorry to hear about you husband. It really must be extremely difficult for you with children. I just could not imagine your situation but you are a strong lady and sensitive to the needs of your husband's wishes.

My sister too wanted to be cared fotlr in her own home which I fully appreciate as I would be the same in her sitiuation. However, she has the srynge drive which we initially were both not too happy with. But have to say now , its been a God send. As it is controlling her pain and she is no longer using every ounce of energy to hold her self together. the intensity of pain which she endured caused her to be sharp when she is usually such a gentle and thoughtful person. Which she also was aware of and oppologised.

So now her pain is being managed and her personality is once again apparent in our time spent together .she is relaxed, some days chatty and other days , quietly having a bit of space where she can just chill out on her own .

We chatted about this in a very honest manner and she expressed her desire to sometimes have quiet times alone from me. Which she needs .I guess it's a learning curve and a healing time where we both have the opptotunti y to be who we are regardless of her illness. Where my sister still wants '_normality' .

So each day has had it's mountain tops and its low valley's but each day has also enabled me to gain strength. Though I still cry healthy tears.

So I pray and hope things are a little easier for you . At least when the time comes we will know  we gave our all and tried with the best if our ability to meet their wishes, which was/is to be cares for at home in the arms of thosevwho love them. Keep being strong but kind to your self as well.