Lost my dad

I lost my day last week to lung cancer he was only diagnosed six weeks before. The last 5 days he went down hill fast but was still eating on the Thursday on the Friday he was in a huge amount of pain and had the syringe driver put in which put him in a deep sleep within a few hours. He passed away three days later with us all by his side. I just worry the syringe driver was put in to early and if it hadn't been would he still be alive today ? 

  • Hello Clarisa, I'm sorry for the loss of your lovely dad. I lost my dad to lung cancer too just two and a half years ago. From diagnosis to death was only 17 weeks with no treatment, just comfort meds. At the end, dad was given morphine then passed away several hours later. For a long time afterwards, I questioned myself and the hospice nurses because I wondered did I speed up his death. After much research and professional medical advice, I realize that it was NOT the meds that took my dad but the cancer itself. His cancer was terminal and advanced in stage 4. The 7cm tumor in his right lung had already been obstructing his airway. Fluids were building up. It's such an ugly disease BUT I feel fortunate that my dad didn't suffer much or for long. I can't tell you how to feel but fortunately your dad too did not suffer long considering his diagnosis only 6 weeks prior to his passing. I understand that you and your family are still in shock as it all happened so quickly and unexpectedly however know that God has a perfect plan. I've read other people's stories of their loved one's last days and hours which were horrifying and agonizing. Please know that the meds are given when medical professionals know that death is in close proximity so that patients can leave this earth peacefully. You said that your dad was in a huge amount of pain.  I am absolutely sure that you would not have wanted your dad to endure pain and suffering in those remaining 3 days. If you had a bad toothache or migraine headache, you wouldn't want to suffer without pain medicine until you can see a doctor 3 days away, correct? Rest assured, you and your family made the right and best decision for dad which he would've chosen the same for himself if he were able to. You were your dad's advocate and did what was best for him. I know you miss him immensely and will continue to do so for a long time to come but your dad is dancing in the Lord's glory, cancer and pain free! He is also very proud of you and he will always guide and protect you for the rest of your life. I hope that I have helped you. Please feel free to ask me anything about my dad and his battle with lung cancer anytime. All the best to you and your family.