Good evening Nita

I've just seen your post and wanted to respond to say that I'm sorry to hear about your brother. Understandably it's a difficult time for you all and natural that you're worrying about what may lie ahead. 

You mention that your brother is being looked after in the hospice. It will be the role of the team there to make sure that your brother is as comfortable as he can be. This may include sedation but it depends on the individual and what they need. 

Is it possible for you to speak to one of the nurses quietly to one side on your next visit about your concerns? I'm sure that they would be able to answer some of your questions and offer some reassurance that they'll do all they can to make things as peaceful as possible for him. 

Sending best wishes at this difficult time. 

Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator

Thanku for ur reply yes we have spoken to all concerned... And today was very hard to see my brother cudnt even wash himself.... As he was and still is a very respected smart good looking man... He's finished tbh.... Nothing left for him to fight no more... The hospice are giving him more drugs to slow him down.... His body is a mass of fluid.... They say not long now..... I find it so hard to comprehend Wots going on as he has fought for such a long long time... God bless him

Hello Nita, I am so sorry that your brother has this awful disease.  My 35 year old son had bowel cancer which spread to his liver.  He was able to stay at home for his last days on this earth, fitted with a morphine driver when he went to bed 2 days before he died.  He was aware the first day that we were all there with him but by lunch time on the second he was not aware of us and he died at 5 o clock in the afternoon,  He was so very peaceful during these two days and for that I am so grateful.  His oncologist had told him and myself when we knew that his time was limited that he would go into a coma as his body would shut down because of the liver failure caused by cancer and chemo.  I reallyt dont know if this is any help to you at this time and I know people do not like to say about peoples final hours and everyone has a different story.  My love to you and your brother and family.

lesliexx

Hi Leslie, thank you for your kind words, with deepest sympathy to you I feel such sadness that your beautiful young son passed from this horrible disease I light a candle for him it's so very sad and heartbreaking my brother has 2 young children and doesn't want to pass at home he's in the hospice getting well cared for, when I went yesterday everything changed again he can't do anything for himself the hospice are giving him extra medication to slow his brain down I don't see my brother my hero my iron man I see a very frightened person laid there waiting to die. He has fought this battle for 4 years now when they gave him 12 months so he's done amazingly well but still very hard and very sad to see your younger brother dying.... It feels a part of me is dying with him. Again thank you for your kind words leslie. Today is another day. My thoughts and prayers go out to you. God bless.... Nita

I’ve just seen your message, so sorry to hear about your brother, my brother has also been in a hospice for 2 weeks now, he has secondary brain cancer which started from both lungs, also from the oesophagus and liver. He found he had cancer in late December 2018 started treatment in January 2019 this year, then 5weeks ago he went from normal chatty self and walking to slow paced kept stopping  for breath and sleeping a lot. I live over the road from him so I popped in 2-3 times a day until 2 weeks ago when the ambulance took him to our new hospice. I visit  him everyday but I see a huge difference in him now, secondary brain cancer has caused him to have stroke like symptoms, lost use of left side of body, vision only out of one eye, left hand shakes. Sleeps on and off, can’t control his right hand and only hand he uses.the Dr that he is under assures us he will have pain relief and morphine when the time comes when he just stops eating and continually sleeps, this is the part I dread the most when he takes his last breath, I was the only member of my family at my dads side  when he passed away and my brother is the image of him and it scares me. My father was 62 and my brother is 59, our mother is doing well at 83. 

Your brother is having the best care, my thoughts are with you and all the patients that have came and passed away at the hospice where my brother is.

take care Sarah xx