I am feeling exactly the same as you today. My dad was diagnosed with bladder cancer a year ago which has now spread. We were told in June he only had months to live. Over the last few days I’ve really seen him go down hill. Today he asked me to look after my mum when he’s gone. Just heart breaking. 

I also don’t want him to see me upset, I had to have a long toilet visit and then hid my face behind a newspaper. It is so hard I have to agree. 

I’ve decided to take time off work now to be with him but how on earth do you do that when all I want to do is cry.