Hi, I am going through much the same as you. Dad had many skin cancers over last ten years, two years ago a tumour was found in he’s neck and removed. It took its toll on him but he survived at 84. Unfortunately it returned with vengeance in January, we had to wait until June to be told it was only a matter of time but here we are six weeks later and Dad has lost weight, sleeps most the time and the tumour has taken part of he’s neck and ear. He gets confused and had trouble coping with the strong pain killers he takes. He has just had two weeks in a hospice. He came home today and I am struggling. No one can tell me how long but I dress he’s wound every day and can’t see many weeks ahead. We have spoken about everything as I was scared it would go to he’s brain before we had chance to. I am on auto pilot. Talk before it’s too late. 

It's so hard to know what to do. We are a very open family, and we've talked about funerals and mum moving closer to us. I just want to try and make the most of the time we have left. We've been trying to plan for Christmas, but again we don't know what will be happening in another 5 months. He's already lost a lot of weight, becomes easily confused and sleeps a lot. He's been like that for the last year. We've put it down to age. 

I understand why the drs and hospital don't want to do treatments. It would be a waste of the time we have left with him, but it also feels like he's been giving a death sentence but no date xx

I totally understand what you’re saying. I feel like we’ve give up and part of me goes into panic mode every now and then. It all seems so surreal but that is part of dying. I can’t bear the suffering, it seems so cruel. xx

So the same. The suffering, waiting and unknowing is the hardest part for us. No one can give us a definite answer. Just waiting for the pain management team to contact us. It's been 7 days and not heard anything xx