Hi,
Last February 2006 my grandma was diagnosed with cervical cancer. It broke me, and I’ve never felt so down. We’re so close and I had no idea it was happening. I’m 13. After the diagnosis, I worried for months and around her third or fourth cycle of chemotherapy, I started battling anxiety. I ended up depressed and anxious and so worried sick of everything corresponding with cancer, my body started making symptoms.
After I got over that, I was finally stable for a few months- until it got worse. It was found to have spread to more lymph nodes even after chemo, radio, and brachaeo. She was due to have another cycle of chemo but her kidneys stopped working properly, and on top of all of this she was taken into hospital after a fall which damaged the vertebrae. Seeing her in hospital, in so much pain broke my heart into a million pieces. That was when it finally clicked in that not everyone beats cancer. On the way home one night, I was told she had decided not to have more chemo as there was a large chance it wouldn’t work, and she decided she would rather just make the most of the time she has left.
We spend every last moment together, but words can’t even explain how much I hate cancer! I know this post is seemingly infinite but I find it useful to express my feelings. I’m constantly reminded of all our precious moments I’ll never get back, and how I was so proud I ignored that pride comes before a fall. My heart aches and it keeps me up at night but I don’t think I’ll be able to cope. It’s growing quickly and time is running out.
