Hi there ...

My sister's got vascular dementure , and in the latter stage now ... how crule your mum's got a double whammy ... life sure is crule ... l know if my sister got cancer on top of dementure, we'd not let her go through chemo or radio .. it's hard enough when you know what's happening ...

So just making her as comfortable as poss and spending as much time as you can ... Will mean a lot .. dementure is as crule as cancer ... so my heart goes out to you ... look after you too ... 

Chrissie x

Jax,

So sorry to hear about your mom. I only joined this site yesterday myself, after my wife was told she has ovarian cancer which has spread to her lungs. She's 47. We have a son who's 7. I am 50, and not in the best of health (but hey, at least I haven't got OC). 

Last night, and like you, I wasn't sure what brought me to the forum either. I was in a state of shock, just came along, and had to say something. The replies that I have had have been extremely comforting in a nightmarish time. Right now, myself, my beautiful wife and gorgeous son face a very uncertain future.

I don't have answers for you, but can only wish you all the very best for the future. And know this; you are not alone in what you're going through. And, as I mentioned, one of the comforting things after I'd posted my very first comment last night was knowing that there's others going through exactly the same thing right now. Not that I would wish this experience on anyone, but it's happened to all of us here and we are where we are.

The upside, some of those people facing extremely bleak prospects are still here, 3, 4. 5 years on from their original diagnosis. Never give up hope. I know that I won't.

Big love to you and yours.

Z

XXX

Zeelund, thank you for a little insight into your life also. I'm not sure why I was drawn to the forum but the need to get words out was great...which is why I posted. Life is certainly cruel sometimes. I wish your little family well. Biggest positive thoughts to your wife, your lad and you. Keep posting...i think it helps...it made me feel a bit better knowing, like you said, i am not alone. Its the fear of the unknown and i think not being in control which is hard. 

Chat soon. 

Thank you for taking the time to reassure me.

Jackie

Xx

Hi Chrissie 

Vascular is what mum has. ..it's a cruel disease....and then this on top....well???

I am going to treasure every moment, every touch and every word we have. I am not going to let her know how I feel....I want everything to be as normal as possible. ...I will continue to make her chuckle and belly laugh. Continue her little mini facials and hand massages I give her. So she has as normal a routine as possible.

Thank you for your kind words.

Jackie

Xx

Hi Jackie and welcome to the chatroom.

Both my in-laws have dementia (one vascular and the other Alzheimer's) so I can imagine some of what you are going through. 

Hopefully your Mum won't be aware of what's wrong with her and if treatment isn't an option, there won't be any side effects to cause concern. That said, this is an awful situation for you to have to go through.

All you can really do for her is make her remaining time as stress free as possible. 

Best wishes

Dave