Hiya 

You must be exhausted. Have you not got any carers who come in to your dad. 

My mum is the same... but there is me and my stepdad ..but we still have carers. And so should you.!!

We were told 2 weeks to a month. And here we are 6 weeks in. I have posted on this situation prior.

It is very hard on the loved ones. You are not alone. 

And as much as you love the ones who are dying..... it can really take it's toll. 

Feel free to message me if you feel happier too. 

Bex

Hi 

thanks for your reply , yeah we have home care that come in morning and night for personal care , I was doing it up until a week ago when my dad was becoming extremely agitated over me doing it and I didn’t want his last thoughts to be that I had to clean him and ensure he was ok .

we also have the nurse that comes in once a day to refill his morphine driver . 

He is very comfortable and not in any pain which is nice for him . His brother and sister are here also and have been staying to try and give me a break , but it’s like at night my mum just says I’m going to bed wake me if there’s any change , I’m not sure if she sees the bigger picture or if she is just wanting to believe it’s not happening . Even if I do get some time off just to go for a walk it’s phone calls to ask when I will be back . I don’t want to sounds like a whinging child and I know I do . I stay over an hour away so I can’t just go “just encase “ I’m feeling like I’m ready to scream . 

 Hiya Lynne

Can you ask for Marie Curie nurse to night sit? 

They can not guarantee to come every night but that would at least give you a decent nights sleep.

This shouldn't all be falling on your shoulders.

I find that know I am getting irritated so easily. 

And it is like living in a bubble... I know how you feel. 

What gets me is every day my step dad says "What we having for tea?". He was doing all the cooking till I came up her 6 weeks ago. This morning he asked.me.ecen before I had put kettle on for a coffee... as soon as I got downstairs!! Like the first thing I must of thoiggt about was .....WHAT SHALL WE HAVE TO eat in 10hours time. 

So infuriating.

Rant over

Lynne,

I was about to ask the same question about Marie Curie. My Mum had them over night and MacMillan during the day, plus family of course.

Good luck

Dave

Hi Lynne

I am so sorry to hear about your dad and the difficult time you are all going through.

Reading through your posts I can see that you have palliative care nurses coming in and the support from family members. 

I am glad to hear that your dad is comfortable but I do think that caring for someone can become stressful at night, this is because there is less activity and less people around.  There may also be more time for your mum to think and possibly worry, so if you have not already done so do ask if there are nurses such has Marie Curie.  Having a nurse care for your dad overnight may allow your mum to sleep and prepare her for the day ahead.

Please get back to us if you need any more information or support.  You may find it helpful to talk things through with one of the nurses on our helpline.  The number to call is Freephone 0808 800 4040 and the lines are open from 9am till 5pm Monday to Friday.

Take care

Caroline

Hi thanks for your post , my dad passed away at 2am this morning , very peaceful and surrounded by family . 

Lynne 

Hello Lynne1981,

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad, on behalf of everyone here at Cancer Chat, I offer you our sincere condolences.

Warm wishes,

Renata, Cancer Chat Moderator

Dear Lynne

I am so sorry. 

Xxxx

Bex

Hey Lynne,

I'm very sorry to hear that.

I hope you're feeling ok in yourself(as can be).