Hi Lise ... please don't think your 'selfish '. When your loved one is going through this. ... you sound wonderfully caring, and this is exactly why we go on here ... to listen and hold each other's hand .. my little niece (who means the world to me) was devastated when she knew I had Brest cancer and having mastectomy... I had to go to her an reassure her , I was fine and ready for whatever it was going to throw at me as I'm an old bird ... but lots of hugs / talking / admitting we were scared helped her , so I totally get how a niece can feel like that ... and I'm so blessed to have someone in my life that loves me so very much ... I recon your auntie will be so proud of you too ...

all I can say is make the most of every day with her ... and even if there's nothing you can do to make it better, holding her hand and just being there will mean more then you know ... my mum went with heart attach so suddenly... I never got to do that for her ...

feelings of helplessness, anger, crying and every other emotion is normal ... if you can put your feelings down here, it could help, and knowing your not alone ... my heart goes out to you ... big big hug ..... Chrisie Xx