Hi Linda..... can't imagine how you must be feeling at mo .... life seems to knock us down , just when we're not expecting it .... the thing that helped me was saying to my self to stop looking at the whole picture ... just one problem an one step at a time  ... 

I wish I could help more but hope sending caring thoughts to you ... big hug xx

Hi Lynda,

I too am in a similar situation with my husband. I wasn't going to join anything online but when I saw your post I just wanted you to know you are not alone. Life is so unfair. I live Day to day and cannot get upset in front of my husband because he can't handle it. I am sorry for the loss of your Mum.

 I agree the waiting for the next test or result seems endless, I likened it to being on a conveyor belt waiting for the next stop being unable to make plans or move on. I refuse to waste a moment not knowing what the future holds. I have my moments alone of course and I will have to deal with the inevitable. I write a list of daily tasks as I will do nothing without one. Coping strategies eh?

sometimes I stop and think what's the point? What am I doing. Then I give myself a pep talk and remind myself I'm here for him while he needs.it is sooooo hard,but as I said you are not alone. 

Take heart 

Rojoy x

Thanks for your reply. I am not used to sharing my problems on forums either but sometimes i feel so low and sad that i have to let it out. Some days when my hubby is not too bad i take off in the car to town and go sit in the coffee shop alone and try and convince myself things will get easier

Thank you x

Hello lynda

I completely understand your feelings as my Mum has been given almost the same diagnosis.  We were told 2 1/2 weeks ago that she would have the an appointment within 2 weeks.  The actual appointment arrived yesterday and isn't until Sept 21. I feel frustrated for my Mum and also it feels a bit like they can't really do anything so there isn't really any point rushing.  Makes me so sad as every minute is precious.

i really hope the chemo gives you  both some extra time and helps your husband.  This is such a hard time and my thoughts are with you. 

Hi Lynda,

You are really having a time of it this year. I would imagine that, having lost your Mam so recently, the memories seem just too fresh to have to go through them all again.

My Mum had breast cancer for 12 years. She was diagnosed with secondary cancer in her last year. By this time it was into her lungs, liver, bones and brain and it was an extremely harrowing time.

I hope that chemo is helping your husband. How many sessions is he due to have?

You will cope. I have heard the saying that 'the Lord doesn't throw at you any more than you can cope with'. I never fully appreciated the voracity of this until cancer hit my family, but we definately get an inner strength.

Thinking of and praying for you both.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Claire,

 I am so sorry to hear about your Mum's diagnosis and prognosis. This is such a hard time for you. I cared for my own Mum for 12 years following a cancer diagnosis. It spread to liver, lungs, brain and bones in her latter stages and it was heart-breaking to watch her deteriorate so quickly.

You feel so frustrated when it is just down to palliative care, but there isn't that much that you can do. You seem to be doing what you can by taking things day-by-day and making happy memories along the way.

I am thinking of and praying for you both.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx