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terminally ill

kimmisoo
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hi im kim 44yrs old with terminal cancer....im looking to speak to anyone in the same position...mcmillan are supportive but i feel i needto speak to people in my position people who actually know how it feels to be dying  of cancer. men orwomen please lets chat good or bad feelings doesnt matter, xx

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    Hi Kim,

    That sounds like a good idea, I'm not sure I qualify as my initial prognosis turned out to be over pessimistic. I do know what it's like to live from one scan to the next, knowing it is only a matter of time before the pause button is released and the journey starts again.

    All the best

    Dave

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    Hi Kim Im in my mid 30's and terminal as well. I actually wanted to start a thread about trivial anecdotal stuff we terminals experience as we traverse this stage of our illness because im pretty interested about how people like me go about and carry on with their lives. You know anything anecdotal, like strange/memorable/meaningful dreams we have while we sleep, or some minor philosophical realization we have while taking an afternoon walk, or conversations with strangers as we wait for our turn during our consultations, scans, etc, recommendation for a good book, movies, video games, music, hobbies (its not too late to share and experience something new... in my opinion). As much as I possible want to focus on those tiny precious moments we are now trying to have (though future dreams and hopes are also encourage). Expressed in poets or short stories or something romantic. Some of us would probably want to leave a legacy or something. Maybe one day someone will compile them up and turn it into a book so people like us in the future can read them up.
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    Hi Kim,

    I'm also terminally ill with cancer.  I am 58 and was diagnosed in July 2015. The hardest thing for me is knowing how badly it is affecting my family.  I have a husband,  2 children and 4 grandchildren.  I'm doing what I can to leave everything in order when the time comes. I have even arranged and paid for my own funeral so that my family haven't got to deal with that as well. I think once you come to terms with it,  it's not as hard for us as it is for those you leave behind. Take control of what you can and enjoy the time you have left. Everyone dies eventually,  we know roughly when, so we can make sure that we leave nothing important unsaid or undone.  Sending you love and support. 

    Tina  

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    Hi Kim,

    I too am terminal at 58 and only been dealing with it for 16 months. Some days I can deny and pretend that all is normal and other days I have a very hard time dealing with the fact that I am going to live a much shorter life. I am not married and do not have children so that is a relief not to cause more pain. I have 2 cats that are my family and worry about will happen to them,silly to some people but they keep me going during the really dark emotional times I go through sometimes. I often feel alone in a world that will just keep on going whether I am here or not. People tell me the emotions are less as time goes on but I don't think so for me as I am just angry,sad,scared and wish I could turn back time or wake up and find it's all been a bad dream but no. I hate cancer and what it does to lives.

  • Offline in reply to Annie58
    Hi there Kim, I have terminal stomach cancer and was diagnosed in April, I am married and like you have no children but we had until recently two African Grey parrots called Max and Lucy. I am 67 and was worried about what would happen to them as my husband suffers from ill health, in fact I was more worried about Max and Lucy than myself . So about two months ago I contacted a wonderful charity called the Cinnamon Trust, their tel no. is 01736 757900 and spoke to Moira who is so understanding. She arranged to rehome Max and Lucy with a gentleman who has birds of his own, I was able to speak to him and we still keep in touch so I know they are doing well and I can visit if I want to. The Cinnamon Trust arrange transport and collect your pets and they are guaranteed a loving home and all homes are vetted by them. I miss my pets and have real peace now knowing that I have done my best for them. It may help you to contact them and when you get to the point where you can no longer care for them, then they will help you.There is no charge but I made a small donation to thank them. Yes cancer is an awful disease and it makes you feel very isolated and many friends don't even know how to talk to you. I haven't told many people as I hate the pity and sympathy they try to express. Anyway Kim, stay strong and look forward. When I was first told about my cancer, I looked on the internet and had myself dead and buried when I read various accounts, but now I just think I have to take a day at a time and thank God I am an optimist by nature.....hope to hear how you are getting on and you take great pleasure in your cats because in my opinion you get more comfort from animals than some people...best wishes...Mary.
  • Offline in reply to Annie58
    Sorry Annie in my earlier reply I called you Kim by mistake...I must be going senile in my old age, but do you find that cancer gives you a foggy brain ? I seem to be in a constant state of confusion.....best wishes....Mary.
  • Offline in reply to jacko13

    Chemo brain and being permanently exhausted can fog your brain :-)

  • Offline in reply to Tellis

    Hi Tina, I mayself have had stage 4 cancer for the last 8 months , I like you have come to terms with my mortality but I also feel for those that I am leaving behind. I am surrounded by love and  I try to embrace life . What will be, will be and in order to cope we have to accept our condition. 

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