Last few days are getting me so down I could sit up mountain and scream I can't shift this feeling. My mother starting to have bit pain in here side where the turmour is she went to doctors they said its turmour pushing up she not aloud to lift she can't even lift my 9 month old baby up:( it's starting to feel real now. Went to see here Thursday and the first time since she found out she haven got long she open up to me we had chat I cried. She told me she fed up she can feel here body going down she said she can't walk far because she in pain. Only time she not in pain when she lying on bed.then she said why here how can you answer I really don't know what to do or say I'm there for here trying to be strong but is so hard watching someone you love go though this.its so hard I'm walking around shopping today hearing people talking about Christmas and I feel like screaming I can't even think that far ahead why that all going though my head why.i can't even go any where I live incase someone ask about my mother and I got to go though the pain telling them.i know I not only one.i really don't know what to do I don't know why writing this wish this wasn't happen I feel mentally drained I love my mother so much it's so hard.
