Lung Cancer - End Stages

Hi

This is my first time on here in the forum that no one wants to join.

My lovely mum was diagnosed with Stage III lung cancer in April this year after what may have been a misdiagnosed biopsy earlier in the year in which they thought that the mass on her lung was of 'cut glass appearance' and not cancerous.  Her symptoms did not improve on the steroids she had been prescribed and after a further biopsy she was sadly diagnosed at the end of April.  She was initially told that she would have a course of Radical Radiotherapy as a curative treatment as she would not be strong enough either for surgery or chemo.  Unfortunately, mum has had a series of bad chest infections and pneumonia coupled with severe confusion/delirium and hallucinations which has resulted in hospital stays.  She is now in hospital and very poorly following a pneumonia diagnosis and still very confused.

She was due to start her rads last Monday following it being postponed due to the infections but she was in such a confused state that she was not able to go on Monday, she went on Tuesday with some coercion from my dad, but would not or could not comply with instructions on Wednesday last week when it was then abandoned at the request of mum's consultant.  At a meeting with mum's consultant yesterday, he confirmed that the cancer had spread in her lungs (they had not re-scanned the rest of her body/brain) and any radiotherapy treatment would cause more distress/illness than the treatment would justify.

She is still very confused and is sleeping a lot.  She has lost a lot of weight and complains of mouth ulcers.  She is not able to come home as she is too poorly and my dad would not be able to cope so they are planning on discharging her on a 'fast-track' to a nursing home. 

The consultant told us she had "a few short months" but he told one of the nurses 1-2 months.  How accurate does anyone think this is based on your own experiences?

It's so hard to think about anything else at the moment and my brother is finding it very difficult to come to terms with the situation.

Sorry for rambling on and any advice would be very much appreciated.

Sandra x

  • Sorry to hear about your mum my husband passed away 11th November 2020 so understand how your feeling takE care of yourself annie x

  • This is my first time on here & it brings tears to my eyes reading everyone's stories & my heart goes out to you all. 

    My mum was diagnosed with terminal NSCLC with mets to the liver on 15 November 2021 (she was originally admitted to hospital for abdo pain so had a scan of her stomach which showed the bottom of her lungs) they then did a full chest X-ray & ct scan. The doctors diagnosed mum as having lung cancer with liver mets & that she had months rather than years left. They discharged her from hospital that day & she had to go back a few days later for a bronchishopie that has confirmed that she has NSCLC & that there's nothing they can do for her. The docs have said that they might be able to offer immunotherapy at some point but at the moment she's not fit enough so they would review her in a few weeks. 
    She is now on her 2nd hospital admission since then. Initially  they said she had pneumonia as she was showing high infection markers she also had a blood transfusion as her HB was low along with low sodium levels & on o2 as her saturation levels wer low, the oncologist felt it was the cancer causing her symptoms & doctors decided to discharge her as she just wanted to be at home with my dad (as he has pancreatic cancer & is awaiting his operation).

    Mum was home for 4 days before she was admitted to hospital again as we couldn't control her pain & she started to cough up blood, they have put her on 40% oxygen as her saturation levels were so low, her HB & sodium are still very low.

    We all feel like we are going around in circles & have no idea what way to turn. We are not really getting any direct answers from the doctors mum is very distressed being in hospital. Yesterday my mum & I had a long chat with a doctor who has agreed that maybe it would be best if mum comes home with palliative care & has now done a TEP from for DNR, non admission to hospital & no IV antibiotics (as her veins keep collapsing).

    Mum is in quite a bit of pain mainly upper right abdo & back she gets very tired easily & sleeps a lot but insists that she's not sleeping very well, she's been incontninent a few times & hasn't realised she's messed herself, she's lost a lot of weight & not eating or drinking very much, she struggles to have a conversation & gets distracted very easily she's very confused at times & miss understands what what she's being told, (she phoned a little while ago & said she's being discharged today, upon speaking to the hospital they are getting everything set up so she can come home but it probably won't be today).

    Im really scared for my mum I can only imagine what's going through her mind I know she's scared. I want to make the most of the time we have left but am also dying inside watching what is happening to her. We have no idea how long she has left we all want as much time as possible but also don't want her to suffer. 
     

    any advice tips or even what to expect would greatly received.

    xx

  • Dear Sandra 1963, I am so sorry your mum and all your family are going through this. Watching a much loved parent suffering is devastating. The only good advice I can give is to spend as much time as possible with your mum, hold her hand and let her know how much she is loved. My next bit of advice would be to ensure she is pain free, if she is determined to stay at home then a Macmillan nurse is necessary if not I would recommend a hospice which is a much nicer, peaceful place with dedicated staff who have expert knowledge rather than being stuck on a hospital ward with over worked understaffed care. Illl be saying a prayer for you and your family. Please take care of yourself