My mom was diagnosed 12 months ago with stage 4 long cancer . They said it was a slow growing but now aggressive tumour. Chemo was unsuccessful although it did shrink the tumour slightly then private treatment that's not available on the NHS to try and contain the cancer but it caused kidney dysfunction so they had to stop.  She had a really good few months after that . Even went to work part time but boom she's now sitting in a chair 24 hours . Not eating wasting away in front of me and won't let anyone help.  She won't even allow the mc millians in . She's so proud and doesn't want to be a burden it's impossible to get through to her and tell her it's what I want to do . Care for her as she had me all my life.. Morphine is doing very little for her it's so hard watching her in constant pain trying to be brave . She's gone from sating she won't be here to get to the stage she is dependent she's even looked into euthanasia.  Now she's talking like nothing is happening and her behaviour is odd. She won't allow doors to be shut.  I'm sorry I'm rambling just so many emotions . It hurts so bad I feel as though I can't breath.  I can't talk to my sister's as they very reserved m I'm the youngest and have a different relationship with my mom. They all expect me to be strong . Don't know if I can be without her.  X