I'm so sorry, honey. I'm in the same boat, my mom is also dying, slowly but surely, actualy she's at the stage where the person she was now is gone, what remains just her very sick body. She got colon cancer, when it was diagnosed 2 years ago it was already stage IV, spread to liver, lungs and worst of all to the brain (at first to cerebellum, now all over her head). Radiation and chemo helped her get 2 years (without it it would have been only several months), but now it's not helping anymore. I don't know how to deal with it too, the worst part is that at some point it seems that I just stopped feeling anything at all because it was simply too much and I'm afraid that when everything will be over the life without her will be unbearable (at least for some undefined time) even though it's quite unbearable now.  

Hi to both of you. I lost my dear mum in February to lung and breast cancer - she unusually had 2 primaries. She really was never well from the day she had her first chemo, she had seizures and eventually dementia.

It was so incredibly tough, we were so very close, I was an only child, and our bond was made closer as I was diagnosed with rectal cancer just 3 months after her diagnosis - we went through chemo together, although she didn't live near me. 

It is do dreadful watching somebody you love so much go through that, especially as I was getting my all clear, at the same time she was told she was terminal. But all I can say is, stay strong, stay positive, if not for yourself, for your lovely Mums as they will draw strength from seeing you like that. My thoughts are with you both....xxx

Thank you for your kind words. I'm really sad to hear about your mom and that you had to deal with your own cancer at the same time, it must have been really tough. And yet I feel that you didn't give up on life, strangely it gives me hope that I can go through this too. In other post you wrote that you feel so alone in all of this and I have to say that even though I do have brother and my father, still this grief is so very lonely, because I too, did have a very close relationship with my mom and at first when her mind started to go I missed our simple conversations on the phone so much, I missed our cooking together and other little things. Now she hardly speaks and if she does it just simply nonsense, can't walk and her leg hurts (because she also has mets there too) even though she's on pain meds and it truly does break your heart when you have to see this. I too, often think that death at this point would be like a gift. 

Hi I don't really have any new or breathtaking advice to give you....I just read your post and felt your pain acutely...!!!!! I've been where you are...felt your hopelessness and your absolute heartbreak..!!! It's the most cruel and indescribable feeling!! I lost my precious dad after a fight with esophageal cancer !!!! That was in march this year and my heart remains broken...!!! 

I just want to let you know that whilst I can't give you any great advice I can empathise with your feelings and offer my support as you go through this journey with your mum!! I can tell you what I did at particular times and what I wouldn't do again...please feel free to ask me anything...if I can help you with anything or just try to ease your pain I will....!!!!   Take care ️xxx 

Absolutey gutted for you I really truly am. My mom was diagnosed with pancriatic cancer on Tuesday , this has now spread to other parts of her body. Really not sure what to do next.......just heartbroken, I'm losing my best friend.....my boys are losing there best friend too....

were trying to stay upbeat even though it's early days but we know what the outcome will be. We are going to have the best Christmas ever if it doesn't take mom too quickly and new year , new memories created of happiness with my mother.

bless you all that are going through this and I say put your two fingers upto cancer and help your loved ones enjoy the time they have left.

love to you all at this very challenging time

jen xxxxx

Hi there, well this is new for me - as usually keep everything to myself, but kind of need to know you are not alone. My mum is very poorly first with ovarian cancer, now in the blood and is getting worse day by day. absolutely hear broken -never though I would be without my mum. So understand how people are feeling too. Its life changing .