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My dad has terminal cancer I need help coping.

Becca27
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Hi, I'm 27 my dad is 58 and we were told on Friday he has terminal cancer.

My dad started feeling poorly in December which he first thought was food poisoning. He gradually began to get worse. He couldn't keep anything down. Then in February he finally went to the doctors (typical man) after weeks and weeks of tests and the doctors saying it was an infection and many others things and different drugs he was only getting worse. He finally was given a sick note from work around 5 weeks ago. 4 weeks ago he went to the doctors for a blood test then recieved a phonecall to go into hospital for 24 hours as his kidneys were failing. 26 days later he is still there and we. Have just been told he has terminal cancer. A primary cancer? In the gi tract and spread to his stomach. They will not do anything with the cancer until they controll the sickness. They say they might do chemotherapy but this will only be to prolong his life if they decide to do it. He has lost 5 stone since January, 1 of which was fluid they drained from his stomach.

I can't believe that only just before Christmas he was my normal dad. Now he's unrecognisable, so poorly and hasn't the energy to speak. I'm a daddy's girl, an only child, I just don't know what to do with myself, I need to be the strong one for my mam but I don't know how? I also have a 7 year old boy. I can't bare the thought of my daddy not walking me down the aisle or seeing more of my babies. I just want my dad back which I no isn't going to happen. I don't know what to do?

Has anyone been through a similar experience? Will he Atleast get a little better before he goes?

Thankyou.

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    Hello. My dad also has terminal cancer. I'm 16 and he's only 44, they reckon he only has a few months left. It's hard but you have to try and be strong for your family, my and my dad are also very close. Try and speak to people about your feelings, that's what's keeping me kind of strong. 

  • Offline in reply to Hxlm9372

    Hi all,

    I just found out today that my dad's cancer is now incurable and he has at best a few months to live. Reading the other posts has really helped me and has honestly made me feel less alone because I feel like I can't deal with this - and I have no idea how I'm going to get through it

    I hope everyone on here is doing as well as they can x

     

     

  • Offline in reply to Becca27

    Im so sory my dad has cancer in throat and liver and like u its dreadful to see my dad wasting away I'm completely lost my dad is amazing man and No think I can do cancer is the worst I've had the worst Xmas ever my so and wife  has just had a baby and it's such a bitter sweet pill his name is lenny after my dad and my dad saw him today I wish my dad could of held him but too weak cancer yr a ***  I hope one day we wil beat u ruby 

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    Hi Becca

    Im going through the same journey . In December my dad was told he had kidney cancer in December . Was told by MK hospital that it hadn't spread and that he will be referred to Oxford hospital just to get medication to shrink the tumour . He went on his own due to covid , hearing not good and doctors wearing masks is even harder . He was told on his own that they couldn't cure the cancer  but try and slow it down . There are no words to say how he felt and how the family felt . It wa alike being hit by a bus , unbelievable pain . He started immunotherapy but unfortunately it didn't work and the cancer has spread more . On a new medication again to slow it down . However,  I have the shadow of a man in front of me which is heartbreaking . I have good days and bad days selfishley I'm trying everything I can for him . Acupuncture, different alternative medication. I'm just so desperate. However , sometimes I just need to stop and think , is all this just to much for dad ? Who knows the answer ? Just don't want to see dad in pain

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