Hello Daveglen,

I'm so sorry to read your post I can't begin to imagine how difficult this has been, and continues to be, for you but you are not alone.

If you are having suicidal thoughts, please try to speak to someone as soon as possible. The Samaritans are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week so do think about giving them a call as they are there to listen and will do what they can to help as well.

I know there isn't much more I can say or do that can change things at this time but as we are here for you if it helps to let off steam.

Moderator Anastasia

hi guys,

my name is Joanne I’m 38, My beautiful mum 61 was diagnosed with lung cancer 4 weeks ago it had already spread to lymph nodes and neck but they seemed positive that chemo and radiotherapy would be the answer.

After the pet scan the doctor told mum it was now in her spine and stage 4 metastasis. They will Give her chemo to help with the pain but it will not cure her, they have said she only has weeks/ months. It’s all happened so fast. 

12 weeks ago I lost my gran suddenly only 5 weeks ago I lost my other gran and now this with my mum. My mum is my best friend I’m heartbroken and have no idea how I’m going to cope without her. I just want to wake up and it all to be a bad dream. 

Mum Is very weak and is sleeping a lot ! She’s struggling to get a breath ans it’s so so hard to watch. 

I really don’t know what I’m asking here but I’m in bits . Xx 

Hey I'm suzy.

I wanted to reply to you to tel you that you are not alone. I am also 38 and my mom has stage 4 terminal cancer. It breaks my heart daily to see this disease progress. My mom is my best friend and I love her dearly.

No words can really help but I do try to focus on the now and try not think to far ahead.

I try to adopt mindfullness. It works for some and not for others. It helps me focus on the present. I still have mom with me and I try to be as strong as I can for her. I sit and we talk about the past happy times, we look at pictures and talk about silly things in life.

Life is cruel and I hate cancer with a passion.

Try to be as strong as you can and look into mindfullness. My heart goes out to you. Suzy.

I have just read all these replies and want to send my live to you all. 

My mum has terminal ovarian cancer. She is currently having chemo and I think managing well but I know her time is limited.

It’s such a difficult journey. I wish I could be more prepared for what is to come and know more. Reality is nothing will and I can’t do anything. I have taken comfort from reading your posts and knowing I’m not the only one  struggling and going through this. 

Praying strength for each of you. 

I'm going through this to now, my mum is in hospital on lots of oxygen, loads of morphine's, she was semi conscious today. It came on strong last night and she couldn't breathe. She had been given weeks/months to live about 5.5 wks ago and was getting by, weak but ok'ish. Not herself anymore after chemo, radio therapy and immunotherapy. She's in a terrible way now and it makes me so upset she's suffering so much and nothing like her former self anymore. She has lung cancer spread to her brain. It's just horrible and heart breaking. I'm expecting the worse news anytime really. So many of us go through this on here, somehow it helps a bit too share but what else can you do. Keep praying for that miracle hey. Being there for her, holding her hand, stroking her hair is all I can do to bring small comfort to her. Bless you all going through this is horrific. I pray my mum passes painlessly and soon in a way so she doesn't keep suffering. XXX feels weird to say that because I want her to live so much too XXX love to all

Hi catess76. Hope you don't mind me butting in, I've got non curable cancer that's why I'm on forum, but that's not reason I'm writing if you take last s off that's my last name just wondering if we're related, i was born in Ipswich Suffolk 68years ago.

, Billy 

Hi Billygoat, My surname isn't cates (if thats what you mean) so probably no, not related.

So sorry you have uncurable cancer like my mum, at one point my mums was treatable but it isn't anymore.

Miracles can happen but obviously incredibly rare but doesn't mean you give up hope or payers ever. 

Regards,

Caroline 

I've just read your post it's been a long time ago that you posted this but I've just cried my eyes out reading this. My mom was dishonest with stage 4 lung cancer that's spread to liver lungs lymph nodes and I'm petrified about losing her she's the centre of our family I can't wrap my head around that I'll never see her again and her suffering. My family is so close. I can't bear how she feels and is thinking it must be Mental torture watching your children grand children knowing your leaving them I wish I could change places with her. It's soul destroying, I'd rather die instead I just want this nightmare to stop but I no it's not going to. X

Hi Pooktara,

I'm so sorry your mum is going through this and your whole family. It's just so damn unfair, but what can we do. Cancer just happens random to anyone at anytime. My mum eventually passed last October 23rd 2019, I am still greiving but I am OK. You can't change this situation but all you can do is make your mums life as best as you can now and just your love will be a great comfort to her. I believe my mum lives within me and has never completely left me because she taught me so much and I have lots of her ways about me. It's a comfort to me. I still talk to her everyday (as if her spirit is with me) and I don't care if it sounds crazy but it's the way I cope. Make the most of what you have now and then always feel lucky you had such a wonderful mum. Take care. I'm thinking of you. And I care. You can get through this, somehow..... X