Devastated

My 58 year old partner finally lost his battle with lung cancer 1 year and 3 months after diagnosis. I am absolutely devastated. 
I can only take comfort that he was able to stay and die at home with me which was all he ever wanted. It was very sudden in the end after weeks of deterioration but he was walking, eating, smoking! and still laughing when he walked to bed that night. I’m grateful for that.