In denial and overwhelmed

Hi, I’m struggling at the moment caring for my partner and I don’t t understand my feelings. He’s done so well up until the last few weeks and now I know in my heart of hearts he is dying. The last few days have been very hard for him and it was a monumental effort to get out of bed to the couch today where he’s been asleep since. I find myself feeling annoyed and almost trapped, then a terrible sadness that is crippling. Sometimes a sense of excitement almost and I’m certainly not excited! I can’t put into words how I feel about losing him we are two halves of the same person almost. I’m heartbroken.