Hello meesie, 

Oh this is so sad - what a difficult time it must be for you and I am so sorry to hear that she can't have treatment. Having to see her go through these seizures must be so hard for those around her and watching someone deteriorate in such a short space of time must be really hard to bear. I am glad that she has received excellent care from the hospice. Don't feel bad about needing some time off work; it is totally understandable given what you have been through and what you have seen your mum go through so take the time you need and I hope that your workplace is being supportive. 

I am not sure what they meant by her being in the next stage - perhaps you could ask the lovely hospice staff what is to be expected as they will know better than anyone how your mum is from seeing her on a daily basis. We have a section on our website on Dying with cancer which may give you some indication on what you might expect in the coming days and weeks. This information might be upsetting so only read as much as you feel ready to and you can also always come back to it later when you feel ready.

Our nurses are also available on this free number 0808 800 4040 - their helpline is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm so don't hesitate to give them a call if there is anything you would like to talk through with them. 

I will now let other members of our forum who understand better than anyone the emotional impact of what you are going through at the moment and it can help to have someone here to talk to who has sadly also looked after a loved one who was terminally ill. 

We're thinking of you during this difficult time and wanted you to know that you are not alone.

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator