Welcome to the forum Lily although I'm so sorry to hear you lost your mum last spring. You have my heartfelt sympathies for your loss.

I can't begin to imagine how difficult it must have been trying to support your mum during covid and how heart-breaking it must have been to hear her say that she didn't want to die but our community are here for you Lily and I'm sure some of our members who have been in a similar position with their loved ones will be along soon to offer you their support and advice.

Coping with grief and all the complex feelings and memories it brings can be very tough, and overwhelming. I'm not sure if you have sought out bereavement support before, but many of our members have found this really helpful when trying to work through their grief so if you'd like to find out more, do be sure to have a look at what support is available through Cruse Bereavement Care and Sue Ryder.

I know nothing I say can take away the pain of losing your mum Lily, but I hope you can take some comfort from knowing that we are here for you, and that you are not alone.

Kind regards,

Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator