Grade 4 GBM

Hello everyone 4 months ago my mum age 50 was sent to the hospital for a suspected stroke 5 hours later we were told she has a brain tumour and it was very big ( leading up to this her mood changes etc was put down to menopause) fast forward 15 days later 15/12/2023 we were told it was a grade 4GBM the ball started rolling and was told her best chance of time was having radiotherapy and chemo together which she started in the January she got 4 days into treatment and was hospitalised as the treatment was causing swelling and after she was stabilised she had surgery to fit a shunt that went through all 3 chambers to improve her chances of being able to carry on with treatment after a few days treatment started again and she done a another week of treatment and ended up in itu with extremely now sodium levels she spent a week in there and her constants spoke with us and said the treatment wasn’t working and she has weeks to a couple of months to live but they couldn’t say any more than that. She spent a further 6 weeks in hospital and now is in a nursing home. I’m the oldest of 4 and I’m 32 years old and the youngest is 24. I’m a mother of two who both have additional needs and I’m suddenly having to rely on my partner their dad to do more jobs around the house etc to help. But I feel so torn all the time I spend half my time home and the other sitting with mum taking care of her loving on her, my mum is my best friend and we’re so close I’m scared of losing her I’m scared I’ve not shown her how much she means to me and my children. She’s changed so much and it’s a pain you can’t describe. I’m not even sure what the point in this post is but it would be nice to know that, that maybe someone else understands this. 

  • Hello Tanya1111

    I'm so very sorry to hear about your Mum's diagnosis and the situation that you now all find yourselves in. It's obviously an incredibly difficult time. 

    Learning that a loved one has an incurable diagnosis and then watching their health deteriorate can be so very challenging in many ways. It's good to hear that your partner is being supportive in practical ways at home to help relieve the pressure. I hope that you and your siblings can support each other with caring for your Mum as her health declines and that you can support each other emotionally as well. 

    Do take the time to talk to your Mum about how much she means to you. Whilst there may be times when she perhaps doesn't always understand or seem to understand, it can be important for our own peace of mind and healing to speak the words we want to share. I'm sure that your Mum appreciates the love and care you've shown her through these last few months. 

    If it would help to talk with someone about your Mum and how you're feeling then you're welcome to call our nurses. I know they will be happy to listen and offer any support they can. They're available Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm on 0808 800 4040. 

    Keep in touch here on the forum if it helps to have a safe space to put down in writing how you're feeling Tanya. We're here to listen and will do our best to support you. 

    Sending you all my best wishes, 
    Cancer Chat moderator