My beautiful mum has been fighting cancer for years and unfortunately they can't do anything else for her apart from manage her pain.

It is killing me to watch her deteriorate and she's in a lot of pain. 

I've always been very brave and never cried infront of her as I don't want her to have to deal my my grief when she's trying to fight her own battle.

We tell each other we love each other all the time,  but I broke down the other day and said that I won't be able to cope if she isn't here and what will I do without her. Its the first time I've cried infront of her as I wait until I'm.on my own, but the guilt is killing me that I put my own grief onto her when I should be strong.