Hi Sophie, my heart goes out to you. I went through similar with my Daddy and like you really struggled at the end with no certainty as to what would happen and when. 

I wish I could tell you what you need to hear but everyone's experience is different, so there is just no knowing. It sounds like you Dad is comfortable with his pain being managed which is a blessing. 

Sending you love x

Thank you so much for replying. Would you mind sharing your experience with your daddy? 

My dad talks and we have lovely conversations and then mid convo he falls asleep. I find it hard because I feel he fights so much. He hates sleeping if we are here and tells us to wake him up etc 

Daddy had squamous cell carcinoma on his tongue, he went into remission 3 times over 5 years, during this time we made and completed his bucket list so had some great experiences together. He had lymph nodes removed from his neck and lost the ability to taste which is the only thing he ever complained about. He was such a trooper. At the end he just didn't want to eat, we had very candid conversations about his wishes, he shared that he had a wonderful life but was ready to go. He had a morphine pump for a few days before he passed so his passing was quiet and pain free. He died 10 minutes before I arrived to his house so mum was with him holding him. 

I found the hardest part was waiting for him to die, as wicked as that may sound it was a relief when it happened, for all of us, especially him. It was the feeling of helplessness and feeling out of control. I was devastated when he died and 6 years on I still talk out loud to him every day. Now when I think of him I don't think of the cancer I think of him well and of all the great memories we shared and I smile so grateful for the man he was. A person may be gone but the love you have for them never dies it just manifests in a different way. 

Friday my mum received the news that she has to have half a lung removed as she has a nodule that is active that is almost certainly cancer. I'm in denial at the moment I think but I find solace in the fact that I have loved my parents with my whole heart. 

I wish I could say something to make you feel better, instead I am sending you love x

Thank you so much. Sending love to you and your mum too. I am so sorry you are going through this. Sending the biggest well wishes to you and your mum.

Its that's amazing you completed the bucket list. I feel this last year we have all had the chance to write amazing memories and to complete the bucket list which has been incredible, especially because we didn't think we would be able to. 

Thanks for sharing your journey - I am really grateful to hear your experience as I feel I have no steer on what could happen. I feel like everything is out of my control and it's so hard to juggle my two small children, life and work. Thankfully I am not working when the drs told us days - weeks if were lucky. My work have been amazing and I feel so grateful but I'm still worried about my job. 

 I have said to my dad physically we may be separated but my love for him will continue to live on and will stay forever. 

His oxygen sats are very low 69, he's generally becoming more weak but despite this he shows such strength and determination to fight. I just don't know how long for. 

Hi Peppa, just want to let you know my dad passed 6 days ago, surrounded by love. Thanks for your love, I hope your mum is doing ok sending love 

Oh Sophie, I’m so sorry, my heart aches for you. Take comfort that you were a great daughter and the love you gave and received will remain forever. I cried for so long when I lost my Daddy, but this I promise you - you will get to the stage, that when you think of him, instead of crying you will feel joy because of all the wonderful memories.
Thinking of you and yours x