Hi Kitiqa,

A very warm welcome to our forum, although I'm so sorry to hear why you've joined us.

Coping with cancer is hard at any stage, but it must be especially difficult for you, when so many important things are going on in your life at the moment. It sounds as if you are getting virtually no support, which is totally unacceptable. Sadly, there is no explanation for why this disease targets some people, yet leaves others unaffected - it never seems fair. It doesn't sound as if your mum is getting much support either. You should both be getting some support at this time. 

Your school should be able to arrange counselling for you, but it doesn't sound as if they've been particularly helpful. There are a number of cancer charities dotted throughout the country. I don't know where you live, but Maggie's and Macmillan are 2 of the bigger ones. They have counsellors who you can talk to and their services are free of charge. There are also a number of smaller cancer support groups locally, which have different names -  The hospital should be able to tell you about these, as should your GP, or local library. It really does help to talk to someone with experience of cancer, about how you feel and how this is affecting your life. Do you have any family or friends who can support you?

It sounds as if your dad is at home at the moment. Does he have any visits from carers or nurses? There are contingencies in place for this type of situation and it sounds as if you, as a family, should be getting them. I hope that your mum has highlighted the fact that the nurses never responded to her call to your dad's care team the other day.

There is a forum called Rip Rap which is especially for young people from 12-16, who have a parent with cancer. You may find this helpful to talk to others of your age, who are also trying to cope with exams, etc at this time. (http//www.riprap.org.uk)

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here, any time you want to talk.

Regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Heather, I know how you feel although I am a lot older than you at 34, I do not have my exams and stuff coming up which alone is so stressful for you. My dad is also terminally ill and is on palliative care. Do you have a contact on any of your dads oncology notes? If you do it may be worth speaking to them, or you can also call the oncology department and ask where you can get advice. Macmillan have answered a few questions for me too, you can do live chat. I am sorry you don't feel like you have anyone to talk to. I think speaking to your teachers after class would be a great place to start. Sending hugs to you. Charlotte x