Hello, my husband has stage 4 cancer and does not want to know.  When he is doing okay, I thought the same.  When things go downhill, it would be useful to have an estimate. But then again, not much I could do with that information so I have decided to focus on the moment, the day and so on.

hope this is helpful

Unfortunately, not much you can do. You could ask him if you could get his permission to ask his treating doctors, and that information will only be kept to yourself. Some couples do make that compromise. However, even that comes with pitfalls. Like accidentally blurting it out etc.

I've asked the oncologist some things my wife didn't wish to know, but she had to give her explicit permission for that to happen. And it's only valid for that one conversation. So i couldn't just call up the next day and ask something else.

Hi,

Thank you for your reply, I think you are right and I will try to live in the moment as well

the days are hard as he sleeps a lot so not much time but one day at a timepiece is all we have.

Love and hugs to you and Hubby at this time 

xx

Thank you for your reply, I am feeling a bit better today and less overwhelmed. I appreciate your advice and will see what happens closer to the time.

you are right if I knew it would make it difficult as I never want to keep anything from him

thank you x

Hi

All the best and take care.  Look into tapping for yourself.  I use it from time to time and it is an efffective technique that acknowledges how you feel..