To cut a long story 2 weeks ago we found out my mums(she is 76) kidney cancer has spread to her liver and lungs and lymph nodes and rather than months to years she only has weeks to months left, to say we are devastated is an understatement and I just cannot get my head around it, she came home from hospital a week ago, whilst she was in suffered with bad delirium, and it seems to getting worse, she’s very agitated, keeps wanting to get out of bed and explain to her she can’t as she can’t weight bear(not cancer related, she had a spinal fistula 23 years ago and it resulted in very limited mobility but had a fall about 2 months ago so bedbound now).  

She hasn’t been told her recent prognosis as her consultant thought it best not too, she just wanted to come home.  But dad is struggling to cope how can I put it but she’s like Jekyll and Hyde with her outbursts, telling us where to go when we try and explain why she can’t do things like get out of bed etc and is very confused most of the time and tearful but most of the other times she is sleeping 90% of the time,  she is barely eating and only just drinking, she is catheterised and has now become bowel incontinent too with what seems like diarrhoea and some days she’s vomiting after taking her medication.  I keep asking myself is she going to see the week out let alone the next month, we keep trying to put on a brave face in front of mum but it’s so difficult and my heart is breaking as we dont  know what to do, she has 2 carers 4 times a day also we are in touch with the palliative care team regularly and they are fantastic.