My Mum is in a hospice now

After reading through several posts, I have finally joined. I saw my Mum 2 weeks ago in hospital. I was told her cancer had spread to secondary sites, including her lungs, abdomen and lymph nodes.She was weak and had difficulty breathing, but was still eating a bit and drinking. I have now come to see her again and she was moved to hospice straight after my last visit.

Now she can only eat a few teaspoons of ice cream and take little sips of fluid from one of those sponges you can suck on. She now talks really softly and sometimes it is difficult to understand her. on. She is so weak now and so so thin. She is still mentally alert though. She is hallucinating, but knows it isn't real. She has just started coughing after only fluid.

I really would like your opinions on how long she may have left. One of my brothers sees her everyday as he is local. My other brother is flying in on Tuesday.

  • Hey lovely. So sorry to hear about you mum I am going through the exact same situation at the moment. My mum was admitted to a hospice 3 days ago, she has lost the use of her legs, can't speak properly, and can barley eat. She manages a sip of water occasionally or a spoonful of yogurt. She is very weak and tired, yet she is still mentally alert.

    We have been told she has 'weeks' but I am not too sure if that is weeks I am just being there as much as I can to enjoy these last prescious moments. 

  • Hello lovely, I'm so so sorry to hear about your mum . 
    last Tuesday 1 st March we lost our dad after a long 9 year battle and finally after receiving every possible treatment he beat the cancer but his liver had failed due to all the infections , treatment it's been devastating and all happened so quickly only a week ago we realised his liver was failing and hospital said there nothing else they can do . A week before he died he was sipping on ice cream . Two days before he passed he sipped on water , 24 hours before he passed he stopped drinking completely and was brought a bed to home as his wishes was not to go into a hospice , in total he's been slowly dying 3 weeks . The active stage of his death was 2 and a half days . 

  • I'm so sorry about your dad and his long battle. My Mum has been battling the last couple of years. Thank you for replying. It is really rough and I am staying at her house now so I can go every day.

  • Thank you for replying. It's so tough isn't it. I'm staying at my mum's house now so I can see her every day. I don't live locally now and I just wanted to be nearby. Do keep in touch and my thoughts are with you.

  • Hey lovely, how are you? How is your mum? My mum sadly passed away on the 10th of March. We thought she might be in the hospice for weeks, she deteriorated quick and it happened a lot quicker than we thought. We were with her when she passed, holding her hand throughout. My thoughts are with you x