I got diagnosed 4 days ago with T Cell Lymphoma. It's a rare one but luckily seems to be caught very early. now its at the stage of having further testing on the biopsy to determine if it is an easily treatable variant, or if it's actually going to be really serious and really hard. hopefully its the better one, (seems like it could be) but who know until the results come back, cancer was never something i thought would come up in the first place! i feel in shock and very distracted. i have amazing support around me and i understand why there is an emphasis to 'stay positive' or 'don't think about it', but i wish there was also more space to say this really sucks and actually it could be really bad. i don't really feel like things are normal so i feel weird that there's this pressure to act normal. emotionally it's all up and down and i wanted to reach out to people who would hopefully understand my perspective.

thank you <3