I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling with your feelings following the loss of your Mum.
I can see from your previous posts that she passed away in June and you've mentioned that it wasn't cancer related. You've also shared that your relationship with your Mum was difficult and that you don't have any support from the rest of your family either.
It's clearly been a very difficult time for you and it's understandable that you have some complicated feelings about all that has happened.
You don't mention in your posts if you've reached out for any professional bereavement support but it sounds like this is something that you would benefit from. You may want to consider getting in touch with Cruse who are able to offer bereavement counselling as well as having at look the Sue Ryder online bereavement community. Alternatively, I'd really encourage you to get in touch with your GP who will be able to help you find some professional support to help you.
It's obviously a difficult time for you right now. Grief is a natural process but can be devastating. Add to that all the other aspects of your relationship(s) that you've shared and it's going to take time for you to process all that has happened. Be kind to yourself Lil123. Take things a day at a time. Reaching out now for some professional support will be a good step in helping you on this journey through grief.
